Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I just would like to know how others make it through this in one piece. It seems I am constantly getting hit with everything from every direction, and I don't know where to turn. My anxiety/depression level is at an all time high these past two weeks. From having my kid kicked out of daycare to most likely having to find a place to live shortly, to work being made stressful, when your supervisor makes it difficult on you and is quite nasty to you on most occasions. All I want is a little peace. Nobody is doing well, my kids are suffering, I am suffering because I cannot do it all, and I suffer bc they are. All I have asked for is a little repreive, but I get none.
Somehow in my head I know we all make it....I just can't see the light and I'm getting few hours if any sleep, due to the worry on my mind. It's easy to say let it go, but when you live it, and walk it, I can't. I won't say that to someone bc I do not walk in their shoes. We are all different. I just wish I had some answers and I need them fast. I'm most like going to lose my job or quit, be homeless and have no place to go, and I don't know how to help my children. I'm overwhelmed, not to mention, I have the passing of a wonderful woman and friend on my mind. I think of her children. I guess I'm trying so hard not to focus on me and see the big picture, but I have no picture until things fall into place.
Somehow in my head I know we all make it....I just can't see the light and I'm getting few hours if any sleep, due to the worry on my mind. It's easy to say let it go, but when you live it, and walk it, I can't. I won't say that to someone bc I do not walk in their shoes. We are all different. I just wish I had some answers and I need them fast. I'm most like going to lose my job or quit, be homeless and have no place to go, and I don't know how to help my children. I'm overwhelmed, not to mention, I have the passing of a wonderful woman and friend on my mind. I think of her children. I guess I'm trying so hard not to focus on me and see the big picture, but I have no picture until things fall into place.
The first mistake I read in your post is that your trying to make your situation better by worring about others. I know it is what is in your heart and you feel you need to, but your own problems wont fix themselves either!
Please turn your focus to you for once and look around at what you can do to make it better. i am going through much of the same as you right now and I too worry about living on the street with my kids someday. Only we can fix our own issues though. File bankruptcy if you have to, look for a new job, there are a lot of day cares out there.
My son was kicked out of 3 day cares and then diagnosed Bi-polar and ADHD. He is now 12 and doing much better, but it took that walk through life to get him and I both were we are now.
I am here for you any time so please lean on me all you need.
Love and ya and hugs!
here is one site that has some good ideas:
http://www.helpguide.org/mental/stress_management_relief_coping.htm
hang in there. you can do this. :)
When you are traveling on an airplane, there is a reason they tell you to put your own mask on before you try to help anyone else. The same thing applies here. Make sure that you are above water and able to breath, get the rest you need, and function properly, before you try to help others. Othewise you bury yourself deeper in the pit and make it that much more difficult to find your way out.
Also, I have found that deep breathing exercises really help me to destress.
Its officially 9 months for me tomorrow since my husband left us, and 9 months ago, 8,7,6,5 I was still a walking zombie.
sometime around the 7-8 month mark I started to see the real me again, am I over it no I'm not, but I've learned to live with it.
My stress and anxiety was unbearable, I ended up getting meds to help, and what a difference that made.
As for doing it all , you can't it boils down to just that. You can't do it all, you have to pick and choose your battles. I was very focused on a clean house, perfect mother crap that I did when I still had a partner, very quickly I let it go. My kids are rooms are disaster's now, and while it bugs me it is so much easier than trying to keep up with it.
Take it one momemt, one breathe at a time, until you one day realize its now one day at a time, then one week
(((HUGS))) you will get through it