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Would have been our 3rd year wedding anniversary

mariel83
mariel83
I have been single for 11/2 years. It has been a rollercoaster ride since the separation and through the divorce process. All I can say is I have survived. From time to time, sorrow still visits me. There seems to be some residual pain that does not go away. Part of me is still clinging to the better times of my marriage. I spent christmas all by myself. It was utterly long and sad. But I also liked the peace and serenity. Today, would have been my 3rd wedding anniversary. I cant help but reminisce the way I felt during that day 3 years ago, it makes me sad. That day reassured me that I will not be alone at least during christmas. But my expectation was wrong.
Sarasalt
Sarasalt
What a hard day, I'm very sorry you're dealing with this. Anniversary dates near holiday dates... it's the worst, I understand that hurt. I'm glad there was some serenity on Christmas, and that you feel like you've survived such a tough ordeal. It gives hope to those of us still unable to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Sending hugs your way.
dreamliketrance
dreamliketrance
this past Dec 8th would have been my 3 year anniversary. Our divorce was finalized on Dec 1st. I picked up the final papers on Dec 9th and cried for like an hour outside the courthouse because like you I thought about how just 3 short years ago I saw the most amazing future and that I would never be alone again.

It's so hard to let go of expectations. Even though I'm only 29 I don't feel like starting over. I spent 6 years cultivating a relationship and loving someone more than I thought possible and at this moment I don't feel like ever doing it again.

I know that with time, this will pass and I'm sure there is someone else out there better suited for me. I learned a lot about the kind of person I am (care too much/feel the need to save people) and how to make better partner choices in the future thanks to my therapist.

And I also spent christmas completely alone....well with my cat. There are plenty of us out there that spent Christmas alone. It wasn't too bad for me. I just spent the day relaxing. It was nice.

I think there will always be residual sorry when something is so monumentally dissapointing. Sounds like you are doing pretty well though so stay strong! There are plenty of good holiday seasons ahead I do believe! :)