I read it BEFORE I got married and I found it really helpful.

when i was a teenager in the 1960's, i watched many 50 something fathers and husbands dropping dead like October flies.

i remember thinking that those men loved too much.

Verne, yes, good point....this read doesn't have to be gender specific...

the term dysfunctional relationship implies that there is such a thing as a functional relationship. but, unfortunately, few of us sit down with our partners and define in practical terms our custom designed versions of a blissfully functional home life.

so, by default, centrifugal forces tear many relationships apart.

Hi Verne: Dysfunctional relationship means the relationship has headed off in the ditch. It doesn't mean that it can't be worked on to get it out of the ditch.

couples have to realize that they created the ditch or it was created by default since they didn't create anything else.

if we do not consciously create, then we will accidentally create subconsiously. it is our choices with our partners that determines them.

Well said Verne.

If you do not choose, you still have made a choice.

emotional love is the easiest kind of love. it is child's play. we can have all of the mushy feelings in the world but if we cannot apply our feelings to good imagery, ideas, thoughts, actions, dreams, and goals - our emotional love is practically worthless.

we simply have to face the fact that most of us are pretty inexperienced at expressing our love well as adults both to ourselves, our partners, and anyone else. we have a lot to learn and now that we are single again, we have all of the time in the world to really get good at it if we put our minds to it.

Or, we let the pendulum swing in the direct opposite direction.

Tough as nails....