Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
My 17 yr old son came home at 10 pm the other night, after track practice and work, to need to get a Victrola from the basement for some strange bring something from the 20's day in his history class.
I was dead asleep when he came to me asking him to carry this up from the basement, then we were trying to get it work -- it worked for his class.
I finally figured out at 1 am that my ex organized this whole thing. I woke up wide awake at 1 remembering all my son said. My ex was picking this up to take to school, so that's why we had to have it ready. My ex broke the wood frame loading it, I did get the piece back--now to figure out how to fix it.
I won't deny my children out of anything, but I hate when my ex uses me.
Anyone have similar experiences
I was dead asleep when he came to me asking him to carry this up from the basement, then we were trying to get it work -- it worked for his class.
I finally figured out at 1 am that my ex organized this whole thing. I woke up wide awake at 1 remembering all my son said. My ex was picking this up to take to school, so that's why we had to have it ready. My ex broke the wood frame loading it, I did get the piece back--now to figure out how to fix it.
I won't deny my children out of anything, but I hate when my ex uses me.
Anyone have similar experiences
I didn't do anyting at 10:00 at night because I would have been sound asleep and was getting up at 5:00 AM or 5:30 AM the next morning to walk the dogs and get the morning started and ready for work and all that. So it would have been out of the question for me to have gotten involved with son and a school project for the next day at that time of night.
When you have a ex that you have doubts about, always first as "what did Dad say about it" and I think you'll find out everything you need to know before you do anything and then you get to decide from there. Many hugs.
My boyfriend gets totally P.O.'d at him and his behavior that he wants to get back at him. My ex has done many things over the past two years. Breaking into my house while I was out of town, denying it, but my friend could tell there were things missing, and my dog sitter saw him leaving. I went on a week long vacation with my friend, ex knew about it for 9 months, then told me I needed to pay him for the days my son was with him. I left money for my son, but also came home to missing food from my freezer and pantry.
Not sure why he's so vindictive. When I filed for divorce 4 yrs after he moved out of our bedroom, he didn't say a word. He just went with it. Other than nasty e-mails, the only thing he has said to me since the divorce was "No matter how much weight you lose, and how long you grow your hair, every man you date will see how fake you are." My boyfriend and I have been together since I filed for divorce (we were friends and dated in college). He knows I'm not fake. I did lose 70 lbs from the stress of the divorce, and didn't cut my hair for over a year, due to stress and being used to $70 hair cuts.
I know ex has a problem, as do my kids and family, because my boyfriend is still married. His wife filed around the same time I did, which is when we got together. She stopped it a month before the final hearing. He's filed 2 times after, all to end because she's not happy with 50/50 custody and monetary settlement.
But, my boyfriend is over for a few hrs everyday after work, does all my lawn and snow removal, fixes what needs to be fixed, takes care of my dogs, makes me dinner, takes me out, and it's strange, but I think he likes to be needed, and after 22 yrs, it's nice to have someone take care of me.
TIme makes it easier...and no one, unless they put serious effort in, can stay mad 100 percent of the time.
You will need to speak with him on a need-to-know basis; if this situation is need to know, then ask.
You have kids with him, so complete no contact is not an option.
My son will be 18 in Sept., but still will be a Sr. in HS, so he can decide where to live, or to keep sharing time. I'm afraid because I lost my 22 yr old daughter in HS when I made the choice to cut off life support of my father. He had heart surgery, collapsed, was non-responsive for 45 minutes, Dr's couldn't find brain response, and unfortunately, I was his medical rep. I was never forgiven, and when I filed for divorce, it sealed the deal that she wanted me out of her life.
My ex changed from this experience. He holds it against me about my father. He lost his father when he was 16, and I finally figured and found it out from one of my Pastor's, that he married me for my father. Who marry's the boss' daughter, just to have a father? My ex did.
Now, I'm dealing with him, the family who just doesn't get it, who the minute they met my boyfriend wanted him to sign a contract that he's not after my money, without getting to know him, blaming him for the divorce.
What I do know, my son realizes how much he does. He does almost everything for me. And, wants nothing in return. While most would be offended by the e-mail from family, he laughed. Said he's sign it if we were married.
I also get the feeling ex, and I get it, that I had ex boyfriends keeping in contact --no physical contact, but if I asked, they'd be here. He also, in order to avoid jobs around the house hired a worker from my family's company (whick he works for) to finish what he didn't want to do. He and I are now really good friends, if my boyfriend bails, he's there.
Mine married me bcause I just happened to be dating him when he had a need. Too long to get into on your discussion. He also made me his mom. Please look up Narcissism and see if this fits your ex.
Mine is still causing me problems because we are tied together on this farm. I am working to get him off the mortgage. I can't give you any advice. I can just say that I totally understand what he is doing and why.