Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I used to text with a guy all day everyday (I met him in real life and we live in different countries), he suddenly pushed a bit away. He wanted to see me again, but he said he needed to move our date. He has told me before that it was long time ago he liked a Girl that much, then I told him last week how I feel and that I like him (a little long message), he told me he likes me, but he can't do the long distance, and he thought I understood that it would not workout. I was sad, but in the end I said to him "let us stay friends" and he said "it sounds good". We have not texted since, and it is a week ago. Please can you help me guys? He is 29, why does he not want to be more serious? Will he one day change his mind about the distance? What should I do, I really like him, and can't get my mind of him.. If I moved to his country in the future will he then be with me? I just don't get this.. Can someone tell me ehy a man at 29 yyears acts like this?
They say "absence makes the heart grow fonder". Is it possible you have him on a pedestal since you haven't seen him in so long?
Moving to his country would be a huge risk. You would be isolated from your family, friends, job, and community. Then, how could you trust him after he suddenly changed and distanced himself from you? It is normal to feel sad, but I'd advise that you get busy and make future plans for yourself, your career, your future, and someone else will come along who wants to share that with you.
True what you are saying.. Its because I have been through something before, therefore I get so emotional.
I believe just like 11christmases said is true that it is incredibly risky for you to move countries.
If he is acting distant already now, what if he changes his mind when you make the move?
I think as well as being busy and pursuing self-growth you should take some time to meditate and think of all the negatives of the long distance relationship all the risks and also the good and see where you stand.
I hope your pain becomes less and less
He will keep you in the friend zone to keep tabs on you because he does respect you. Then when he is ready and he knows you are the one he will
Close the gap and he will make his move unless someone better closer to home comes along. He never really fully commits until he is sure you are the one. He isn't leading you on. He is actually doing the most loving thing by allowing you to develop and discover yourself and work on you. It's works in your best interest too because you may find someone who is a better fit along the way and then you will have maintained a great friendship with this guy instead of attempting to make something work that just would never work out because of distance and then you lose a great friend to boot.
Also give the man credit; he knows he has needs in a relationship that can only be met in a face to face relationship. That takes maturity and self control to not take advantage of satisfying immediate needs in a very selfish way.
So stop obsessing over what you can't have and focus on what you do have and be thankful for it instead of upset it isn't going the way you want it.