Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
This is from my journal and I just wanted to put it out there for a little advice or whatever...it is from last night...
I just need to vent...to give a brief synopsis...I bought concert tickets for my "husband" for our anniversary in early May for this group O.A.R. that he likes. It was before I knew about any of the emails and the affair still going on. Well the concert was tonight and I knew he was on-call at the hospital and didn't bother to ask if he wanted to go..figured I'd eat the cost of one ticket, scalp it, or give it away...and just go myself. Well, in the midst of a torential downpour and 90 degree weather, I still decided to stay at the concert...figured what the hell I had a babysitter and I would enjoy the music. Well, I get a text from his whore saying and I quote "Lisa-you know I'm here and I know you are here alone. I am with a friend from jh, if you want to join us? Just a thought..." WTF? Is she fucking crazy...like I would want to join her. Immediately I was in a texting war with said "husband" saying why does she know I'm here...it's none of her or anyone else's business, why does he need to tell her where I am. I told him this is the reason he needs to find a new place to live and pronto..kids or no kids I need my peace. I also said I am sick of being their topic of conversation and being made fun of and I hope they are happy I'm a joke. He said he told her I was there so we wouldn't run into each other and didn't tell her to text me..she took that upon herself. I was so hysterical crying, some poor girl was comforting me. I couldn't even enjoy the show. It's like she was trying to dig the knife in a little more being that I was alone. I have never been so humiliated in all my life. Then I'm leaving to go to my car and who do I see but her pulling out of the lot. I had to hide behind 2 security men before I went up to her car and pulled her out of it. Why are they doing this to me? All I want is to be left alone. I started to text her but did not....she is not worth my energy so I put all that anger and resentment into texting him on how I felt. That should give them something to talk about. I almost wrecked the car coming home 2x's. I should not have been driving being that upset and in the rain, but I have/had no choice. I have nobody to call and I need to do this on my own...being upset or not. This is what I have to look forward to...fucking harassment and them laughing at me and me being a joke. They can all go to hell! Sorry I'm a little angry. I called my mom and she gets mad at me..she doesn't know what to do for me but I cannot take it anymore. I'm one step away from a nervous breakdown and I can feel it. I just want this "Groundhog Day" to stop and for me to be left alone with my boys. Is that too much to ask? He continues to wreck me and any benign conversation ends up between them, as well. I can't take it...this is why I say NOTHING to him. I wish God would strike one of them, just so I can have a moment of peace...that is all I ask. For me to have a moment as to figure out where my life is going without having the OW in it.
I just need to vent...to give a brief synopsis...I bought concert tickets for my "husband" for our anniversary in early May for this group O.A.R. that he likes. It was before I knew about any of the emails and the affair still going on. Well the concert was tonight and I knew he was on-call at the hospital and didn't bother to ask if he wanted to go..figured I'd eat the cost of one ticket, scalp it, or give it away...and just go myself. Well, in the midst of a torential downpour and 90 degree weather, I still decided to stay at the concert...figured what the hell I had a babysitter and I would enjoy the music. Well, I get a text from his whore saying and I quote "Lisa-you know I'm here and I know you are here alone. I am with a friend from jh, if you want to join us? Just a thought..." WTF? Is she fucking crazy...like I would want to join her. Immediately I was in a texting war with said "husband" saying why does she know I'm here...it's none of her or anyone else's business, why does he need to tell her where I am. I told him this is the reason he needs to find a new place to live and pronto..kids or no kids I need my peace. I also said I am sick of being their topic of conversation and being made fun of and I hope they are happy I'm a joke. He said he told her I was there so we wouldn't run into each other and didn't tell her to text me..she took that upon herself. I was so hysterical crying, some poor girl was comforting me. I couldn't even enjoy the show. It's like she was trying to dig the knife in a little more being that I was alone. I have never been so humiliated in all my life. Then I'm leaving to go to my car and who do I see but her pulling out of the lot. I had to hide behind 2 security men before I went up to her car and pulled her out of it. Why are they doing this to me? All I want is to be left alone. I started to text her but did not....she is not worth my energy so I put all that anger and resentment into texting him on how I felt. That should give them something to talk about. I almost wrecked the car coming home 2x's. I should not have been driving being that upset and in the rain, but I have/had no choice. I have nobody to call and I need to do this on my own...being upset or not. This is what I have to look forward to...fucking harassment and them laughing at me and me being a joke. They can all go to hell! Sorry I'm a little angry. I called my mom and she gets mad at me..she doesn't know what to do for me but I cannot take it anymore. I'm one step away from a nervous breakdown and I can feel it. I just want this "Groundhog Day" to stop and for me to be left alone with my boys. Is that too much to ask? He continues to wreck me and any benign conversation ends up between them, as well. I can't take it...this is why I say NOTHING to him. I wish God would strike one of them, just so I can have a moment of peace...that is all I ask. For me to have a moment as to figure out where my life is going without having the OW in it.
I would also stop texting him, unless it is direct regard to the children. Let him figure out where he is going to live, and figure out how he is going to support you and the children while doing so, as it was so easy for him to figure out how to have an affair, this should be a no-brainer.
I know how hard it is to really have no one to talk to or you can turn to in your life. It makes it that much more tougher to get past moments like this cus all those frustrations, thoughts, etc are stuck within you. You have one part of your mind, heart and soul trying to be logical while the other part is running through a number of overflowing emotions. You are more or less just fighting with yourself with sometime no logic to be found. But you have people here that will listen. That will provide support and that you will find that you can turn to when you need to.
There is peace for you to come, don't lose sight of that through all this turmoil and one thing to remember is, what you put out to the universe will come back twice fold so make sure even though angry, you wish no ill will on them wish them peace in their childish antics and thus peace should be returned to you.
best wishes
You say they are laughing at you and making fun of you. Do you know this for a fact? If not, don't assume they are discussing you. That only causes you more stress.
If she texts you, simply ignore the texts.
I know this is difficult, but no contact is effective. They never know what you're doing or what you're thinking. I've found it to be very successful in keeping stress away.
Hugs! I'm sorry you had a bad experience.
If she is in his life, you need to keep him out of yours.