Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
It's been just over two weeks since my divorce finalized and I wanted to pass along how it's been in case anyone has been wondering what to expect after theirs is done...
I guess the biggest thing is it feels like "the weight" has lifted, and I'm no longer in the not-really-married-but-not-divorced limbo and I know that had to play a part in my emotional well being. Now that it's over, I'm free to do what I want without having to worry about if it would cause any problems with the divorce still in the air.
I'm finding that the "emotional roller coaster" affects me less and less with each passing day. Again, being in limbo played into that. Like most of us do or did, I had high highs and low lows that leave you wondering if it's ever going to stop. While it may not completely stop for a while, there have been less rides on it for the past month or so. It may not seem like it, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
You'll see people mention the "no contact rule" on here and trust me, it works. I put myself thru almost four months of pain before it blew up and we got into it which led to my severing any ties with her and that actually became a good thing. It may hurt at first, but no contact will help you get thru this.
Any newbies reading this and wondering how much or if this board is any help, take it from me - yes, it is and all you have to do is ask. When I first came here in January, I was an emotional wreck that was hurting so bad that I actually considered suicide. The people here pulled me in, some showing love and concern, some giving me a good swift kick in the ass, and others sharing their experience(s). In your posts, write down what's really bugging you because I guarantee you that somebody on this board has been thru it and their advice can help you maybe find the answer you seek...just ask and they will help you as they helped me. I am not even going to try to name all the folks here that reached out to me because I know I'd forget somebody but I want them all to know just how much they helped me and that I do appreciate it!!
I guess the biggest thing is it feels like "the weight" has lifted, and I'm no longer in the not-really-married-but-not-divorced limbo and I know that had to play a part in my emotional well being. Now that it's over, I'm free to do what I want without having to worry about if it would cause any problems with the divorce still in the air.
I'm finding that the "emotional roller coaster" affects me less and less with each passing day. Again, being in limbo played into that. Like most of us do or did, I had high highs and low lows that leave you wondering if it's ever going to stop. While it may not completely stop for a while, there have been less rides on it for the past month or so. It may not seem like it, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
You'll see people mention the "no contact rule" on here and trust me, it works. I put myself thru almost four months of pain before it blew up and we got into it which led to my severing any ties with her and that actually became a good thing. It may hurt at first, but no contact will help you get thru this.
Any newbies reading this and wondering how much or if this board is any help, take it from me - yes, it is and all you have to do is ask. When I first came here in January, I was an emotional wreck that was hurting so bad that I actually considered suicide. The people here pulled me in, some showing love and concern, some giving me a good swift kick in the ass, and others sharing their experience(s). In your posts, write down what's really bugging you because I guarantee you that somebody on this board has been thru it and their advice can help you maybe find the answer you seek...just ask and they will help you as they helped me. I am not even going to try to name all the folks here that reached out to me because I know I'd forget somebody but I want them all to know just how much they helped me and that I do appreciate it!!
As many of us here often say, "There is a good life after divorce." I hope you will find all the happiness you deserve.
Big hugs!!!
This site is amazing, has helped me tremendously to just vent and get feedback from others feeling the same way.
I've seen some on here who have been jerks but that's where that little ignore button comes in handy. Most folks here do have your best interests at heart in their responses but at the end of the day, it's up to us to put them into action. Some will recommend books and articles, some swear by support groups, although not all areas have them and that's something that I encountered and others will share their experiences but helping people is first and foremost on their minds.
This board really helped me and if anything I've written over my time here has helped another, then it's accomplished everything I wanted it to do.
Take care.
I agree the boards here are helpful. Venting here, helps me to keep it together in the real world.
I still feel the highs and lows and hopefully the low part we be less.
Good luck with you future and once again thanks for sharing!!
My unwanted divorce is almost final, waiting for judges signature. I can relate to the in limbo feeling. At first you can't believe this is happening, then you try and fight it and hang onto something that is no more, then you go into deep sadness which consumes your very being and you can barely survive your life. it is a roller coaster of feelings and emotions, up and down, sideways and backwards (kind of , lol) and then one day you realize it really is over, you can't do a dang thing about it so you either give up and die or you get up and take your life back. They once had power over us, they took and destroyed our hearts, our families but now you get up, brush yourself off and turn the page to your new chapter....it is our time to heal, to grow and to soar!
This website has been the best help to me out of everything I did. I will never forget the countless times I came here feeling weak and broken and someone had written something that got me thru the rough times, I will always be grateful to you all. And yes, it's free therapy.........yea! I will also say no contact saved and worked for me.
As we have all done, take it one day at a time, be gentle to yourself, come here often, stay busy, plan something fun to do each week and hold on, it does get better and one day you will smile and find joy in life again!!! hugs-