So today is the day my lawyer is filing with the courts to have custody, child support, etc. set up. My ex wouldn't communicate through his lawyer to try and negotiate instead of going to court. My lawyer can't even get his lawyer to respond to any of our requests.  I keep asking if it is his lawyer or him, she thinks it is him because she has other files with this lawyer that they communicate regularily.  I feel so low and just sick over sending this stuff to the courts.  I didn't want any of this but he has moved on and has been living with another woman and puts on facebook that he loves her, is affectionate with her in front of everyone, etc. (he only left our home in May and even told me in August he loved me).  I am heartbroken and he doesn't seem upset at all. He has stopped helping to pay for any of our higher payment joint debts, things for our 2 kids, or mortgage etc.  I can't afford it all and he knows that, he doesn't give child support or anything. I just hate all of this, I am scared of losing the house before we can sell it, I asked to list the house and he won't agree, it is like everything I say he wants to do the opposite. How do people do this?  I have to go home after work every day and put on my happy mommy face to raise our kids so they don't know that he stopped helping, I don't believe they need to know any of that.  They just need to know mommy and daddy love them and that none of this is their fault.  I just wish he would agree to selling the house so it could be listed and hopefully sell so the kids and I can move into something I can actually afford.  If he would just agree and negotiate between the lawyers then we could have so much less communication with each other and have schedules and plans and things set up.

I was wondering if anyone has read any books that helped them get through this horrible time?  I am just trying to find anything that has helped people feel better?  I can't take medication, I have negative side effects with it.