Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Do you think we spend way too much time thinking about them? I wonder if he thinks of me as much as I waste my time thinking about him. In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter? Have any of you wanted "that" song to be on their radio, or that "episode" of your fav tv show to be on their tv so they are thinking of you? Maybe we dont want to become distant memory to them. It hurts too bad to think that way. But really, we need to be out there in life making ourselves happy! Life is way too short, and no one knows this better than me. So, people, lets make it through another day, and remember, we are loved and blessed. You may not think so right now, but you are.
Just wanted to vent a little. Sorry:)
Just wanted to vent a little. Sorry:)
deleted_user
Venting is good. You are right though. Human nature is such we actually feel better if we think our ex is as miserable as we are... you are absolutely correct, "Life is way to short..." CHeers
deleted_user
I totally agree. I know that I need to realize that I AM loved and I do have family out there that will NEVER leave me. Right now, I think about my husband almost constantly. I was thinking earlier today about how in the world I was going to STOP thinking about him. It's almost imaginable not seeing him ever again after the divorce. I need to get him outta my mind because he's certainly not thinking about me. In fact, he basically told me that he wants all this done so he can clear his mind and think about other things that are coming up..like his Staff test. Wow...he wants to forget me. SO, I need to start focusing on MY future, and learn to not think about him constantly.
deleted_user
i can't count the number of times a day my stbx comes to mind. i can be in the middle of God knows what and there he is, right in the middle of what i'm doing, even if it has nothing to do with him. I don't know if he thinks of me as often, but he told me yesterday he loves me and that all this doesn't make sense. what does that mean? but it doesn't matter. what does matter is that yes, we are all loved and Blessed by so many other very special people and it is time for us to THINK ABOUT OURSELVES and make it thru another day! and make it a GREAT day!
deleted_user
I agree with Journey, we may never know if they think of us as much, but I imagine we enter their minds often. But it is time for us to move on and rebuild, and when we remember let it be good things, staying angry only prolongs the pain. In the end we are where we should be, we are who God made us to be, and there is no shame in happy memories.
deleted_user
not sure about any particular situation - but in mine, i think all the time and i left - but i also understand that there is no repair in my situation as all resources has been exhausted. so now, just trying to adapt to a new way of doing things.
chowgirl
My stbx came by today while I was at work to get some of his things (it was planned). When I got home I saw several of his cigarette butts in my ashtray outside, and I couldn't help but wonder if he was looking out at my (should have been ours) beautiful property and thinking about how badly he'd mucked things up. I was just about to post something about needing help to be strong when I found your post. You're absolutely right! I need to quit worrying about what he might be thinking (in part because he's probably not thinking anywhere near what I imagine) and get on with life. It's hard, but I'm going to make it here on my own (with a lot of help from my friends!).
deleted_user
Well, I am pretty sure since there are children between the x and I there isn't a day that goes by where she doesn't have to think about me. Is she miserable? I think so. Does it matter? Nope. Because all she wants to do is be rid of this marriage we had. The miserable state is a stage to her as it is to us. However, I can take some comfort in the fact that I am not so screwed up that I have resorted to alcohol, drugs and other replacement/distraction behaviors in an effort to kill the pain. I know that if I do not experience this pain undiluted I will not heal correctly.
deleted_user
Thank you for this post. It is hard not to start thinking this way. To want them to feel the loss of not having us in their lives. But as you say we need to make the most of what we have. Thank you for the post.
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