Warning: looooong post here.

I married the kindest soul and I don't know how he turned into who he is now. He is reacting so strange to everything. We decided to do this respectfully and he has been anything but. We told our child about the divorce a week ago, and every day he has acted in a way where even our child is pulling me aside and saying, "Mom, what the fuck was that? He is acting weird."

Example/timeline:

Sunday: we sat down with his parents (who knew ahead of time) and informed our child. They agreed to be there to show our child support because I did not want him to get the news and have to decide whether to hug Mom or Dad. It went as well as could be expected, however, my husband did not do much except look at his feet in shame. We decided to make it our goal to go through this process as respectfully and fairly as possible. I told him to move upstairs & he agreed.

Monday: half the small town already knew by the end of the day and his 23 year old girlfriend had friended quite a few of my co-workers at the hoghschool. He also tried to talk me into filing on-line and got very snippy when I told him we were going to sit down with someone educated and do it right, like grown-ups, have everything documented, and noterized by the court even if it doesn't go all the way to the judge. I would love to settle out of court if we settle fairly.

Tuesday: he took our child shopping for second semester school supplies and our child came home pissed off. I was told that "Dad wouldn't stop talking about his girlfriend and her baby (not his btw) and made our kid stand there while he picked out baby supplies when he haden't even paid the fees yet for his elective classes that were due in October." He even pondered buying our child the laptop he has said no to 2 years ago when he told him to get a job & save up the money himself, which our child has been working hard to do. Our child told me that he just looked at Dad & said, "Don't you dare kiss up to me." He even had the audacity to tell our child he had been unhappy for years but did not want to break up our family.

Wednesday: when I left school, I went to the law library to educate myself before he got home. I brought my phone with me thinking nothing of it. I am pretty sure he used the program I know is are on our phones to locate our child when he wanders, and saw I was near the courthouse by the way he acted that evening. He came home on time for the first time in months acting strangely chipper. He was offering us both money (he has never offered money... we ask & he requires a detailed explanation) and telling me how he appreciated me saying we could do this respectfully and not go behind each other's back. As soon as I told I appreciate him seeing it that way, in the next breath he was talking about not having to do all the child support stuff because our child is already 16 and telling me he doesn't see a reason why we can't  do this without saving the house he worked so hard for. All my warming flags went up and even our child was looking at me with that "weirded out" look on his face. I didn't dare tell him that someone vouched for me and legal aid has decided to take my case because our finances and petsonal documents are locked up tighter than a camel's ass in a sand storm and he evades the situation when I try to gain access. I have never even laid eyes on the title of our home!

Thursday: he avoided us both as much as possible and there were failed attempts to get into both of my e-mails all day long. This weirded me out, so, I made the decision to try to open a bank account in my name only because it would only take $1 to do sonce I already have a joint account there. I found $1 in change, left my phone at home after work, and went to the bank. When the banker looked up our account she told said, "Oh, I was mistaken. He has you on the account but not the membership. You need $25 for your own membership. I then asked for statements for the joint account & was told that he needed to sigh a release the way he had set it up... locked up tighter than a camel's ass in a sand storm again! I will be standing in line Wednesday to draw my entire paycheck out as soon as it is deposited.

Friday: he avoided us all day. While he was gone I took all the rest of his clothes, his childhood knick knacks, and all the gifts he had given me upstairs from our bedroom & tossed them in his room. I even carried his locked up cabinet I am not allowed into up the stairs, completely full of porn & strange sex toys I never knew about (I only found out because I picked the lock).

Saturday: I avoided him because it was my late mother's birthday and every time I look at him I can feel her rolling over in her grave. My mother amd I both bounced his girlfriend on our knee when she was 6 years old while my mother was on home hospice caree dying, and I was pregnant with our now 16 year old child. Her father, one of my close friends, I am sure is rolling over in his grave too. Today I went and got a burner phone that he cannot track and will not know about. This way I can leave the phone he pays for at school, or my cousin's house with the paperwork she is hiding for me see legal aid again without him knowing this week, and privatel talk to my lawyer he doesn't know about.

Today: I have realized that the most painful thing for me is that hindsight is 20/20. I am realizing all kinds of stuff.

I would appreciate any and all advice right now. I am broken and do not know how to feel. He was my first boyfriend, together 23 years, married 18 years. I have never been through a break-up. I am devastated.