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Talking again

paiste7
paiste7

I have not posted in a long time. My ex of 8 years texted me a few times and called once. I always respond to her.


But I have been careful not to call her. She texted me back in October. About a month ago, she texted me again and I replied. Not a lot. Nothing about us.


Then she called me asking me why I never call her and that she always calls me. I told her that I did not know if she wanted to talk with me. She also sent me and my dog a Christmas card.


Since then, we have talked a few times. From what I hear, she's over me and just sees me as a friend. But being that she sent me a Christmas card and called me if she is having second thoughts about breaking up with me. If so, she has not hinted at it at all.


But it feels like we are at least talking like we once did.


Any thoughts? Thank you.

mirandac
mirandac
Unless you have children together i would
not get too Friendly. You need to stay detached
From her. Many people can just keep it surface
Only. No personal stuff like F&E and thoughts.

I for one would not be willing to go there. HUGS
justmakeitstop
justmakeitstop
The fact that you're inquiring about this shows you still have at least some feelings for her. She might just be wanting attention right now. Talking to her maybe setting yourself up for a big fall.
STex
STex
RUN! She is lonely and needs your attention now. Stay detached, you don't have to be mean, just keep it brief. The minute she gets her needs met, she will split again. I would be very hesitant to start anything up again.
asil909
asil909
Sounds like
She maybe isn't sure what she wants right now and may be sending you mixed signals. I would be careful as to how you choose to proceed and just be ready if it doesn't work out again.
wakan49
wakan49
Sounds like she calls you when she is feeling guilty about your break up. Be careful you might get hurt all over again. been there done it.
SassyGrace
SassyGrace
I'm with STex.

Please don't let anyone use you.

Please learn to value yourself and your feelings enough to not allow someone to mess with you emotionally.
paiste7
paiste7
Thank you all! You all make a lot of sense. It is so strange not having her around and not seeing her family at holidays and special events. A lot of it is loneliness on my part and not having any immediate family here, with the exception of 2 aunts, who I barely see. It's me and my beautiful and loving Black Labrador Retriever. She's better than any person I know.

Thank you all!
jojored
jojored
You could ask her openly and honestly why she's back in contact with you.

If you have any wishes to reconcile, you both had better be straight with each other. If you have no intentions to get back with her, I say go no contact. You don't need the frustrations and mixed signals.
hope123
hope123
I personally dont think you should talk to her until your ready to just be her friend. Usually when you breakup with someone or someone breaks up with you, they dont really want you out of their life completely because it hurts so much to get rid of that person completely all at once. She broke your heart and you must stay strong to not talk to her. Someone like that dont deserve your kind heart. She might also be feeling lonely, thus comes to you to talk to. All i'm trying to say is be careful. She hurt you once, it can happen again. U gave your heart to her once, you cannot give it back to the same person who hurt you.
paiste7
paiste7
Excellent replies and advice everyone! You all make sense. It just feels so strange. And I keep wondering what her family and my siblings, aunt and family are thinking. I have a feeling they all blame me and think it is my fault. I keep thinking about all that happened during the last 5 years that we were together when it all started to be and feel different.