Breakups & Divorce Support Group
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This year I told my 2 teenaged children that for Father's Day, I would like them to attend church with me. I only recently was reborn, and wish to inspire my children to seek God in their own way. I won't pressure them or demand they go, that would most likely turn them off for good. But for Father's Day we are having a special drama presentation, and I think the kids will enjoy that.
My problem surrounds the stbx. She is suspicious of anything I do, and has talked tot he kids about not going to church. She said that if they do choose to go it would be out of obligation to me, not of their own choice. I am OK with that. But then she went a step further, saying that if the kids go, she is going to go.
I have a problem with her attending this church, I would be more comfortable if she went to a different one. Perhaps this is selfish on my part, but I truly want nothing to do with her, other than the kids hand off. But the reason she wants to go is to protect the kids from me, or from over zealous Christians, or to prove she is the better parent.
I know that Jesus would say to welcome her to church with open arms. I would like to emulate Him, but the reminder of her, how she turned her back on me, on us, I just don't want her around.
Am I being petty here? Should I be more generous towards her? Please, I'd like your opinion. Steven
My problem surrounds the stbx. She is suspicious of anything I do, and has talked tot he kids about not going to church. She said that if they do choose to go it would be out of obligation to me, not of their own choice. I am OK with that. But then she went a step further, saying that if the kids go, she is going to go.
I have a problem with her attending this church, I would be more comfortable if she went to a different one. Perhaps this is selfish on my part, but I truly want nothing to do with her, other than the kids hand off. But the reason she wants to go is to protect the kids from me, or from over zealous Christians, or to prove she is the better parent.
I know that Jesus would say to welcome her to church with open arms. I would like to emulate Him, but the reminder of her, how she turned her back on me, on us, I just don't want her around.
Am I being petty here? Should I be more generous towards her? Please, I'd like your opinion. Steven
i digress... anyway, if you are going to a mainstream type church, then your x ... can she really have a problem with the kids going? how old are they? I could see not wanting my kid left in some church nursery that I don't know anything about, but if it's your basic church, then how is occasional attendance going to be any more dangerous for them than riding the school bus or eating in the caf at school?
It's a really hard question. But since it's father's day, I would ask her again if you could just take the kids with you, and be able to relax, b/c it will be hard to relax if she's there, and it's salt in a sore wound if she's there. and if she could do that for you, you'd appreciate it.
but remember: do not fight battles that you cannot win. that's just giving away your power. it's more powerful to let those things go.
blessings on you and on your fathers day and on your kids ~tb
anyway, you are obviously on a very positive path... happy almost father's day to a great daddy! ~tb