Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I got through this past Thanksgiving and Christmas without him in my life or celebrations with family. I also went to my son's wedding without him and took my best old friend as my guest. It was hard though.
Getting on this forum this week has stirred up a lot of memories for me and reminded me that I do deserve to not be treated like he has.
My birthday is right around the corner and he destroyed two of them while we were married. One day he skipped most of my surprise party so he could have some alone time and surf porn, on my mother's computer, of all places to do it. That happened more than once.
And one year I agreed to spend my birthday watching him play music and leave me sitting with whoever was around that I might know. He hardly spent any time with me and spent what little he was near me obsessing over the cleavage all around. There was no getting him into conversation with me or anyone else. He had nothing to do with me almost the entire day. And I had to put up with one of his idiot friends for company. .
He ruined a Christmas or two also. One year we were getting organized to travel up north to see family and he said well I don't have room for you and the dog in the car. I was like excuse me, what is different than any other weekend, fine and FYITN ( I won't say what that means). To me that made it clear he wanted freedom to go do what he wanted without me. I drove myself. So my children come in from out of town and we have a big family gathering planned for a nice dinner at my mom's, where we were staying. He declined to join us and wanted to go to a bar and hear music. The dumbass was too stupid to sign off his facebook, again on my mother's computer, turns out he was messaging another woman to join him. I had a couple of shots of good bourbon and put his shit in the hall. He said he did not do it, liar liar pants on fire. (I feel very mature right now - not). I work in an elementary school so that keeps me off the profanity a bit.
There are more but I cannot begin to get into that emotionally. New Year's and more.
Thank you folks for listening to me. This is helping me turn the corner, I think. Free therapy to just write it out to a safe audience.
I would imagine that some of you have had special days ruined too.
Getting on this forum this week has stirred up a lot of memories for me and reminded me that I do deserve to not be treated like he has.
My birthday is right around the corner and he destroyed two of them while we were married. One day he skipped most of my surprise party so he could have some alone time and surf porn, on my mother's computer, of all places to do it. That happened more than once.
And one year I agreed to spend my birthday watching him play music and leave me sitting with whoever was around that I might know. He hardly spent any time with me and spent what little he was near me obsessing over the cleavage all around. There was no getting him into conversation with me or anyone else. He had nothing to do with me almost the entire day. And I had to put up with one of his idiot friends for company. .
He ruined a Christmas or two also. One year we were getting organized to travel up north to see family and he said well I don't have room for you and the dog in the car. I was like excuse me, what is different than any other weekend, fine and FYITN ( I won't say what that means). To me that made it clear he wanted freedom to go do what he wanted without me. I drove myself. So my children come in from out of town and we have a big family gathering planned for a nice dinner at my mom's, where we were staying. He declined to join us and wanted to go to a bar and hear music. The dumbass was too stupid to sign off his facebook, again on my mother's computer, turns out he was messaging another woman to join him. I had a couple of shots of good bourbon and put his shit in the hall. He said he did not do it, liar liar pants on fire. (I feel very mature right now - not). I work in an elementary school so that keeps me off the profanity a bit.
There are more but I cannot begin to get into that emotionally. New Year's and more.
Thank you folks for listening to me. This is helping me turn the corner, I think. Free therapy to just write it out to a safe audience.
I would imagine that some of you have had special days ruined too.
this last New Years he was in Vegas with his mom! I had no idea, I thought he was lonely and suffering at her place as I was sad and lonely at our home.
for one of our wedding anniversaries we were in a hotel, his mom called so we fought about that when I asked why I couldn't have just one night alone with him and not have to share it with his family. I spent tho whole night, crying in a hotel room by myself. sometimes I wish he did have another woman, maybe I could understand this more, but honestly how do you compete with a dying mom? He thinks I don't like his mom, which is not true at all but he totally shut me out of his life and I feel using his mom as his current excuse for walking away from another marriage.
He filed for divorce on my birthday even when he sent me a happy birthday text.......I could go on but I need to get out of this funk
Just have the balls to say you don't want to be with me and then maybe I will respect you. That is what I am asking for now, just respect me.
Anyhow, by my ex not doing much, not giving a damn, it makes the holidays rolling around a nonissue for me. I love my birthday and, yes, at 35, my parents still do a cake and presents for me when my son and I visit. I love my son's bday, and just got home from throwing him another Mommy-made kick ass party. I love Christmas - having Santa coming for my kid, getting time off from school, seeing family. Valentine's Day my ex didn't ONCE acknowledge - but my Dad sends me chocolates every year.
The only holiday he did anything for was, and is, Mother's Day because...let's face it...you helped make this kid, bro, so who else should help him get a gift?
I'm not saying family and friends replace an intimate relationship, a partner who does these things (honestly, the thought of being in a relationship kinda makes my skin crawl), but I am saying that the BRIGHT SIDE of him ruining them means there is less to miss, now.
I don't know if this made sense, I tend to ramble.