Tough to say and you've thrown the ball and upto him to catch it. I don't want to say who needs to make the next move but in poker terms I'd say he checked and the bets to you now. Doesn't sound like you want to fold but do you up the bid...?

I can't. The longer I am in this state the more I am losing myself. I am exhausting all relief aids. I will need meds next. I have to find it in me to move on.

Many Times its best to go to therapy Just for
yourself to talk About it all and seek guidance.

If he would Go alone great too then come
together If at all possible, sometimes its not
Possible to work things out. Thats what You
need to figure out. HUGS

I took your advice and therapy it is. With or without him. It's scheduled for next Friday. I am not sure if I should reach out to him to join me. The problem is if I text him and he do not respond it will really mess me up for days.

There is no reason for him to go with you
right Now. This is about you figuring things
Out about whats good and healthy for you
And your own mental health and wellness
not his. HUGS

That is true. I guess I feel guilty because I know he is hurting too.

Thats not your issue and you can not fix
Or control him only yourself. I use to beat
My head against a brick wall guess what
It only hurt me much more. HUGS

Understand. This is about me.
but, I do not know how I will get past this.
I feel so lost and confused.

I am sorry that you are going through this , the question why is in most cases never answered but once we reach our healing point the question why does not matter. You have to do what is best for you as you did everything you could and I think that he took that for granted . There is an age difference which many say age does not matter , is what matters is the connection but if your giving more and he is taking more then that is not a 50 50 relationship. Your loosing weight and sleep and upset and that is not healthy, Have you thought of therapy for yourself ? You come first and which ever direction this goes remember you come first . hugs

Ghostdancer, mirandac, and onedayatatimeforme all said it really well. You have to take care of you first, and he has to be healthy and ready for a love relationship. Counseling is essential for both of you. If you find that he wont go, then you'll soon find yourself on a healthy trajectory and leaving him further and further behind. Age has nothing to do with emotional health. I listened to a teenage girl today assertively and appropriately stand up to a girlfriend's toxic and controlling boyfriend. I listened to a 61 year old man the other night hopelessly grasp at fictitious scenarios and hold onto bitterness over a past love.

Take care of you. You're worth it. You are valuable. You can do this.

Thanks so much guys!! I'm going to counseling this week. I've decided to try to move on. Reaching out and being rejected puts me in a very dark place. It takes so much out of me.

Sorry may not be enough but action is. If you are willing to work on this by going to counseling you have done enough. He is not willing he is not doing enough to fix this. Quit feeling bad and tell him to get over and let's fix it or shut up. Punishment time is over.

I can't be the only one wondering why your boyfriend thought that having you be a major player in raising his 18 year old son was a good idea. There's less age difference between you and the son than there is between you and your boyfriend. Of course he's difficult to handle! In his eyes, you're a kid!

I guess what I'm saying is that this isn't entirely you're fault. He set expectations you couldn't possibly meet and he needs to realize and accept that before you can move forward.

When I was going through a breakup I felt so much guilt about my ex hurting. I have always been a peace maker. If something is not at peace and others are hurting I would sacrifice my thoughts and feelings to try to ease the others pain. I was telling this to my therapist one day and what he said opened my eyes so much. He said "you think that other people can handle hard times" he was right. And the truth is is that your ex can handle heartbreak, he can handle losing you. It might hurt like hell but he can handle it. I hurt when others hurt. Sounds like you do too. Give him more credit, he can handle this! So can you! It's so good to hear you are going to counseling. Working on you will be the best thing whether you get back together or move on, you got this! Smile even though it hurts!

@baker it looks like it's over and he doesn't want to hurt me by saying it. I've decided to stop reaching out. And move on this is so unhealthy.

@3cutie yes the age difference between his son and I was a major issue. I guess now that I left and he is fed up with his sons nonsense. He dropped out of college, stopped working, and using drugs. I seen this year ago and tried to help guide him.

@listener I believe he got this overall. I don't. I not sure how to move on. I'm so uncertain about my future. I am an accountant, opened a family company, no children and I don't care about non of that. It's scary to know that I was motivated, driven, loved to workout, wanted to travel, and go back to graduate school. And now nothing matters. All I think about is how much he loved and cared for me. Its bad because it feels like I'm waiting on him. And don't want to move on without him.