Im so sorry to hear what you are going through. Your break up may have been the right thing to do, but you had feelings for that person and logic does not always follow the heart. Take yourself out of the situation for a while. I know it's hard but it will help you in the long run. Stay Strong!

Sorry you are going through this!!

So you asked "when will I get over it?" As soon as you quit worrying about who he is with or what he is doing. Are you two living together? I am confused by the statement of " just saw that my ex will be seeing his ex." How in the world would you know this if you are no longer seeing him? And you state that "it is a kick in the gut every time I see or hear evidence of it". Is someone forcing these things on you? Is someone making you listen to what is going on in his life? If so, you also need to remove these people from your life as well.

I hope you find the strength to move on, to see your true value and to quit putting so much time and effort into worrying about someone who doesn't even think about you.

Hugs to you...it will get better if you make a conscious effort to make it better.

We share a son, so thats why we have contact and thats how i learn these things plus we live in a small town. I try not to think about her and him at all, and have been doing quite well with that lately - until it is in my face and then it hurts like hell. I try to focus on my future and taking care of my son and planning for what I want me new life to be like - this stuff sneaks up on me and like I said, hits like a kick in the gut.

Having a child together must be tough! I was lucky enough to not have children with my ex so I was able to completely cut all ties and move forward.

Not sure how old your son is, but wondering if there is a way that when he starts to tell you what his dad is doing that you can say something like "that is personal to your dad and we really shouldn't be talking about it".

There are lots of people on this board that have successfully accomplished no contact with kids involved so hopefully they can provide some advice!

yes, you're right. I have been trying to be pro active in making sure my son sees his Dad and knows that family is still important. As usual, I am the initiator with little response from the ex. I think it is best now if I leave all that behind and let my ex make his own arrangements for our son. He is moving on, so why should I stay stuck. This last day and night have been the most painful yet, even though I knew it was likely to happen.

Tcl18, I know exactly how you feel! I'm dealing with a similar situation. When my 3 year old comes back from her dads she talks about her dad's new girlfriend and although I tell her not to say anything about that person she still occasionally brings her up. It's hard because their children and they really don't get how it makes us feel. The last time he dropped her off she wasn't even all the way in the door and she blurts out daddy loves mommy and daddy loves Charlotte. I know it will get better for us although it's hard to see right now. I actually was doing pretty good until yesterday and all the family memories came about. I'm praying for us all that life will soon get easier!!!! Hugs to you.

thanks ellesmommy,
its hard for me to think of someone who lies and cheats repeatedly and who believes it is okay going after someone else's partner with no regard for anyone but themselves being in my sons life. I've been physically ill the last 2 days over it and don't know how to come to terms with it. My son is 13 and has high functioning autism - I had hoped he would have had better judgement in setting examples for him - I guess I shouldn't be surprised.