Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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diemjs 08/15/2008

When you and your stbx are in one of those fights we all get into, and he/she says, "Ok, I'll see you in court!" And you know damn well they dont want to go to court because when they are being nice, they ask you repeatedly if you can settle things with the mediator. What would you think?

Mine does this to me all the time. Finally, I told him this: Willie, Im not afraid of going to court. I have nothing and nothing to hide.

He had nothing to say. My true thoughts about him saying this to me is his control. He thought he could scare me with court, but I proved him wrong! Im not afraid and I am in control of me now, not him!

Is this what you all think? I would love to hear what you all have to say.

Oh and btw...for those of you who know, we went to our 2 counseling sessions and he said they were BS sessions. Why? He didnt say. But I can guarentee you its because he didnt hear what he wanted to. Oh well:)

Loved1 08/15/2008

Sounds like efforts to intimidate. Good response on your part. I hope you continue to own your truth and not get shaken by the stbx's threats.

deleted_user 08/15/2008

I'd tell him to bring it on. My stbx keeps trying to pressure me and the judge just slapped him back this week. I would like to avoid court but if it happens, it happens.

Reading your post makes me want to call my attorney and depose OW. I'm going to do it. I'm pushing back. STBX will have a heart attack. Hopefully, he will settle and he can go live in hell with her.

hurtinandhealin2560 08/15/2008

My stbx used to threaten me with divorce every times things didn't go his way. One day I called his bluff and said, "If I'm such a lousy wife, you should file for divorce." Never heard it again.

Yes, it's about control.

deleted_user 08/15/2008

It's about control and money.

deleted_user 08/15/2008

I called my attorney and said tell his attorney we are deposing OW. I go out of town but the shit will hit the fan. I hope he will settle really quick.

deleted_user 08/15/2008

Mine did that to me a lot and he ultimately DID get what he wanted and he knew that he was in control and I would back down. He's slick.

deleted_user 08/15/2008

You called his bluff. You took you sense of self and your power back. Now the ball is in his court. His power was control over you, your control is self control which gives you power. Well done.

Yours went to counseling. Mine wouldn't and I know why. Same reason yours called it BS sessions. You already nailed it; He didn't hear what he wanted to.

Keep doing what you're doing. I am proud of you. This is tough, but you are doing what you have to and remaining strong. HUGS

diemjs 08/15/2008

Thanks all. I feel stronger knowing he is not in control any more.

*doing the happy dance*

deleted_user 08/15/2008

Doin' the happy dance right beside you.

diemjs 08/15/2008

What song you listening to Bert? I think the one for me tonight is FREEDOM by George Michael!

Fitting, wouldnt you say?

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