Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
This has been the hardest thing I've ever been through.
10 months ago we separated. I was expecting reconciliation after the separation. But he became more distant refusing to talk about our problems or get counseling. He stopped returning my calls. Needless to say this was a devastating time. I went through all the debilitating emotions of rejection, pain, fear, anger, depression, nightmares you name it I felt it.
We didn't speak for months so I filed for divorce. We were married in a church in front of friends and family but never got a marriage license. So he gave me 10,000 dollars to move out when we first became separated and thaught that was the end of it. He said we never got a marriage license so we didn't need a divorce. This was after 10 years of living as man and wife.
He really believed he didn't owe me anything sinse the house and cars were in his name. He told me that I was already compensated with the 10,000 he gave me.
Well, it felt so good to hear the judge say that he orders the house to be community property and that he orders it to be sold and the equity be split. Yay!!! Take that you know it all, lying, cheating pompas asshole.
I did have an emotional set back after court he texted me and said it was very hard seeing me and he wanted to call me by the court order was no contact. I asked if he wanted to meet for a cup of coffee. He said yes but he was drinking a beer at the local bar, which was a huge issue during the marriage, he said he would call and let me know when it would be a good time, which he didn't. STUPID ME.
The feelings of rejection, low self worth and fear of being alone all came rushing back. Not nearly as bad, but I'm so tired of having any feelings concerning him. I feel stuck again.
Any advise would be appreciated. When will i be over this??? I'm so tired of dealing with the emotions related to all of this.
Is there a court order of no contact? For your protection?
But,
The day I decide that the relief I'm seeking has to come from the man who tried to rob me blind, lied in court with no conscience or remorse and tried to treat me like an afterthought, I will check myself into a psych ward and beg for help.
Honestly, think about why the hell you are even taking a call from someone that treated you so badly.
Look into CODA or get counseling but having anything to do with him is crazy talk.
There is an update/delete button on the little
Down arrow after the date on your on post.
Sometimes its touchy and you can retry after
15 seconds.
On someone else post you can ignore/report. The
Report one is a joke it doesn't report that post itself
you Have to describe it.
help You heal and not get retraumatized if there
was any Abuse. It helps with your detaching too.
The worse the relationship had gotten the harder
and longer It takes to heal from. Mine had gotten
Toxic and i needed help, support and Guidance
pre and post divorce.
Divorce care, alanon and therapy worked well for
me. I went to DC for as long for as Long i Needed it.
I am glad you are getting a settlement and its court
ordered !!!!! Hugs
It had been months with no contact and I was feeling pretty good. But after I saw him it sent me back into an emotional funk, but I'm already feeling better. I know now that I have to stay no contact.
stay clear of any places he would go. I moved
out of town so i Did not pass or see him after
the divorce.
Its been my recovery journey and it has since the
day he left. He is just in my story and its not about
him Anymore its about me and my healing, growing
And moving on and letting him go. Its still a struggle
And it takes time and lots of hard inner work, HUGS