Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Should I Call

frank817
frank817
My ex and I broke up a week ago. It was coming for some time now. We have been arguing and I really haven't been happy either. Her reasons were because she says she isn't happy and thinks she isn't in love with me anymore. She has always been selfish with me and has been trying to separate me from my friends and family. My mom is going through chemo and she get upset overtime i would visit her because she thinks I'm going to leave her and live with my mom. She feels like i don't make her and her daughter my number 1 priority. In reality i do put them first, but there are times either my mom or my job might have to come first. I think she really isn't fair to me and has put huge pressure on me to try to keep her in my life. I love her and i would like to reach out to her to see if we can fix what is wrong, but I don't know if its something that can be fix in reality. I spoke with her 2 days ago because her daughter was sick and the couldn't contact her. the school called me and i relayed the message. She just said thank you and that she would pick her up. The next day i sent her a text and asked how her daughter was doing. she said fine and we exchanged texts for a few minutes. then i decided to end the conversation. I didn't want to but i figured i didn't want t to get her mad by saying the wrong thing. No i don't know if i should reach out again or wait until she contacts me. I really want to be with her. I love her and her daughter. I raised the little girl from 1 1/2 years old. now she is 5 and calls me daddy. I don't want to lose them forever.
helerown
helerown
That's a hard question. I would say give a shot if you both truly haven't tried to work it out as hard as you should've. However both of you must be willing to put in the work. And if it still doesn't work, then it would only make sense to part ways. If you love her and the relatinship was not necisssarily toxic I would say reach out to her to see where she is at with all this. She may or may not be willing, so you must be prepared for that. Sorry you are hurting.
gem111
gem111
I am sorry for you and the little girl.
It is a HUGE red flag that she is trying to separate you from your friends and family.
You both sound unhappy and your family really does need you now.
I would maybe think about seeing if things could be fixed before going back.
Therapy or counseling may help. You each deserve to be able to see family and friends outside the marriage.
It does sound like she is really selfish and she would have to own up to it and WANT to fix it. That may not be an easy mission.
Good luck
frank817
frank817
I want to thank you for your input. You both are right. All i know is where i am at and I need to know what she thinks and is if she is willing to try again. But Im not hopeful anymore because i know how she is. she doesn't get along with her family and always finds a reason to not be friends with someone. I think she really likes to be alone. And she might have been with e out of convenience. Sorry to be so negative but this is what she has shown me in the past.