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Should I ask for a divorce???

WhitBit
WhitBit
My husband and I celebrated our one year wedding anniversary in January, we have known each other for 6 years, been together 5 and married 1 year. We have two beautiful children a 3yo boy and an 8 month old girl. Lately I have been so stressed out I can't sleep, I can barely eat, and some days I just feel like crying all day. We are in a large amount of debt, I blame a lot of it on my husbandesk because he promised me after our first child that he'd get a better job, (right now he's making minimum wage and 30 hours a week) he has a masters degree and has not been looking for a job in his field for over a year now. We owe over 100 grand for his schooling they took our tax money this year for it, we have two kids now and are scraping by on our bills I don't know how much longer I can do this. I work on weekends so I can be with my kids throughout the week we can't afford day care or a baby sitter. I have talked to him numerous times about my concerns he'll look for jobs for maybe a day and just says everything will be ok... I feel like I'm the only one wh I cares we are sinking....please help...
MyTrueColors
MyTrueColors
Has he been evaluated by a physician AND a therapist? He may be suffering from depression or something else.

Unless he's always been like this. If he has, then chances are he's not in any hurry to change. And that should tell you a lot about what your future will look like.

Either way, I suggest you see a therapist yourself for some support and to help you get to a place where you can make the best & healthiest decision for you and your children.

~healing hugs~
chrisinvegas
chrisinvegas
Contact the student loan processors and ask for Income Based Repayment. It'll drastically reduce the student loan payments, and will relieve some of that stress. Good luck with relationship decisions.
Aronia
Aronia
Idk if divorcing him will make your life any better. The debt won't go away, instead you will be dragging your kids between two households and neither one of you can probably afford housing and expenses on your own.
What is his degree in? What reasons does he give you for not being able to find work?
Your relationship is suffering because you guys don't have time for each other to nurture your relationship.
Something has to give.
samantha717
samantha717
Being in debt and raising two little ones, not to mention your own recovery from recent childbirth and pregnancy can be very overwhelming. The biggest red flag I see here is that he doesn't seem to take your stress or concerns seriously. I have dealt with that for 23 years now in my own marriage. One time, I flat out told him that my feelings for him were changing because of his selfishness and he told me I was being dramatic. I could give you tons more examples of his callousness toward my feelings and my needs, but I'm sure you get the picture. Have you considered getting counseling first, either as a couple or by yourself to help you make this decision? Maybe a separation would help. If not, you would know you tried everything.