Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Hi everyone,
Had a rough day today so really need to share it with you guys and hope for some supportive words.
My ex and I have now been separated for a month. I was feeling low yesterday and decided to check his FB page... There I found a photo of him and the girl he "had feelings for" out for dinner together. I felt sick at the thought of this - I knew that was the motive behind him confessing his confused feelings to me, which made me believe that he and her had spoken about getting together before we split up. I feel like he has used me and jumped effortlessly from our relationship to a new one. (Bear in mind this was the girl he was with in our break last year... Oh did I mention she got pregnant and aborted their child? Which I didn't find out til recently).
Anyway, we had booked a holiday a while back and I was able to get partial refund for it, half of which I wanted to return to him so I wrote him a cheque and dropped it round to his today. His mum and sisters were out the front of his house so I had to small talk with them for a few minutes which was hard cuz I was very close to them all.
Then I bumped into an old friend of both of ours and she asked how we were and I had to tell her we had split up...
It's just been a very tough weekend and I'm feeling totally drained. As it stands he has moved on with the girl he has been working with and had slept with before we got back together. His family and friends don't know, and I'm trying to keep a brave face on when inside I feel ripped apart.
I guess if someone treats you like crap for long enough you begin to believe that's what you are. He did it in a manipulating way, so that I didn't realise it was happening. My self esteem is zero and he is just fine with his new girl.
Had a rough day today so really need to share it with you guys and hope for some supportive words.
My ex and I have now been separated for a month. I was feeling low yesterday and decided to check his FB page... There I found a photo of him and the girl he "had feelings for" out for dinner together. I felt sick at the thought of this - I knew that was the motive behind him confessing his confused feelings to me, which made me believe that he and her had spoken about getting together before we split up. I feel like he has used me and jumped effortlessly from our relationship to a new one. (Bear in mind this was the girl he was with in our break last year... Oh did I mention she got pregnant and aborted their child? Which I didn't find out til recently).
Anyway, we had booked a holiday a while back and I was able to get partial refund for it, half of which I wanted to return to him so I wrote him a cheque and dropped it round to his today. His mum and sisters were out the front of his house so I had to small talk with them for a few minutes which was hard cuz I was very close to them all.
Then I bumped into an old friend of both of ours and she asked how we were and I had to tell her we had split up...
It's just been a very tough weekend and I'm feeling totally drained. As it stands he has moved on with the girl he has been working with and had slept with before we got back together. His family and friends don't know, and I'm trying to keep a brave face on when inside I feel ripped apart.
I guess if someone treats you like crap for long enough you begin to believe that's what you are. He did it in a manipulating way, so that I didn't realise it was happening. My self esteem is zero and he is just fine with his new girl.
One thing I have noticed is the one left behind, male or female, feels so bad because the ex treats his new g/f or b/f so well and they are really happy---
The ex treats the new friend just as he treated the one left behind.
He/she was so sweet at first and by the time he/she left they were HORRIBLE. The new person has a rough road ahead. In not to long of a time in the future he/she will be in the SAME exact spot you are in now. Feel grateful that you are so far above him. He is making a lonely life for himself in the future.
I wish you the best, jackie.
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
There is a quote I like: how can you heal your broken heart when the only one who can heal it is the one who is breaking it in the first place"
You know what? That's bullshit!!! We allow them to break our hearts because we are good people who actually know HOW to love. The ones who are selfish and rotten inside are them. We let them walk all ovver us and they enjoy it.
I want and need answers to a lot of questions I have.... but I will NOT be weak in front if her ever again. So I look for answers here. All of your opinions. Because at least I know that the people here havr good hearts like mine and that's why we suffer so much.
No. Don't give him the satisfaction of seeing you down. Or seeing you sad. Give yourself the satisfaction of just being strong and after all this still being a good person inside.
The best revenge is being happy.... that is SO true. Because people like our exes will NEVER be truly happy because they will never find good people like us again.
What do you think he's going to do to her when he gets bored?
Now I think that it isn't really that he doesn't care at all, it's just he said his goodbye to the relationship and made peace with that loss long before he bothered to even let me know that he was even a tiny bit unhappy much less ready to just walk out. I'm still very unhappy about it all but at least it feels like there's some small level of resolution to one of the everpresent 'why's.
my wife has been wanting and planning this for a very long time.
I had no idea
But she is already so many months ahead of me in her separation from the marriage that ....to feel as disconnected as her will take me six months or a year or....more?
If ever