Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
It's been about 7 months from the minute this process started of him saying that he might want a divorce, then 2 months of "us" (me) trying to work it out, so even though it's been 7 months it's really been 5 months since he decided that what he needed was a divorce. I feel so miserable all the time, I actually look forward to having "okay" days, days where I am not constantly crying and looking back and wondering what went wrong. My stbxh and I have been together since we were both teenagers and now I am almost in my 40's. Everyone tells me to get out there and do the things I loved before him and hang out with friends and enjoy life.. the problem is that I don't know what I loved before him because we don't love the same things when we are 17 that we do when we are 38, so I wouldn't even know what I love, by myself, without him... With friends, the problem is that him and I had a big network of friends, but they are all couples and that group all came from his childhood so even though I have known these women for 15 years at least, it's too odd to bring them all in the middle of this. This is the most miserable situation I have been through, and I've been through some tough times but it honestly feels like I am never going to get through one full day without feeling completely sad and angry and lonely. I recently came back from a trip to Spain, this was something that my sisters and I had planned for a long time for my moms 60th birthday, well even with everything we did on that trip, the beautiful things to see, all the new experiences I still spend so much time dwelling on what I'm going through and if I've spent too long feeling this bad. Maybe it's normal to feel this badly for this long, but like I've said, I've gone through other very terrible things, and I don't remember feeling a quarter of the pain that I am feeling now nor it taking this long for it to go away. If I thought that it was normal to feel this way MONTHS into this, maybe it wouldn't be so bad but 5-7 months in depending on how you look at the start, seems like way to long with only OKAY and bad days, not even one solid GOOD day. It just seems like too much.
after the divorce and decree are in place, IMO.
The separation and divorce are just something to
get thru with some sanity left. The grieving process
is pretty intense for awhile. You will go thru many
powerful feelings and emotions. Like rejection, rage,
anger, betrayal, hurt and pain plus much more.
Keep Reaching out for help and support, i like therapy
and divorce care they kept me sane during a traumatic
Time in my life, HUGS
Feelings are going to come hard and fast. Rejection, betrayal, sorrow and anger are the ones I notice the most but you'll have crazy ones like love take focus and come in and really fuck up your day. I still have loving feelings for my ex. I was with her for 18 years and went all in in the relationship so of course I'm still going to have that feeling and not be able to turn it off like a switch (now...my ex on the other hand...).
Find someone to talk to!!! A support group like this is good to get your feeling out in the open but I think actually putting a voice to it has some strong therapeutic power. Talk to a pastor, therapist, support group, a pet if you've got one, a stuffed animal, whatever. Just don't bottle it up!