I think he owes you 50 years for emotional distress he caused by his cheating and breaking up your marriage and for hurting you for the rest of your life, because after cheating, you are never ever the same!

However... we have to be smart. We have to be strong. We have to stand well on our feet. My exh also told me not to work, but I am my own woman and always has been. I went to work and I went to college and I owned my own business and I m glad I did because when he went screwing other people, I didn't need anything from him.
If I may, I d like to suggest this: Propose a REASONABLE and achievable return to work plan with a time limit. . Make him pay for a work coach, pick a career and get into the work force.
Right now, the most profitable and quickest way to earn money is medicine and medical technology. You can have a 2 year degree and make 60k.
Let him pay you alimony while you go to school, divi up the assets and then, let him go. No money in the world is going to mend your broken heart.
He supported you so you could stay home and not kill yourself like the rest of us, so I think 3 years of alimony is fair. The 3 year mark will also push you to work harder to get back on your feet and you need that... you need to gain your confidence and strength asap.
Hugs.. so sorry he hurt you.

take as much as you can you deserve it

Divorce is a negotiation. Don't give up anything early on. Two years from now if you're in a car accident, you may need the money. You can always give it up later.

Every state is a little different in rules and Regs on
Divorce. My state is no fault and it was 50-50 For us
and I did receive some alimony for 10 years. We had
Been married for 30 years.

Everything depends on the financials and how Long
You two were married and the state rules on divorce.
In my Case alimony was negotiated, some states you
get automatic maintenance. Alimony is not a given
Anymore.

There are some divorce/mediators out there, some use
One lawyer, some two lawyers, some do it themselves.

My ex did not want to pay me any alimony, he did eventually
After much arguing. My lawyer wanted a lot more And for a
lifetime. It was a big sticking point with him to not pay any,
HUGS

Listen to your lawyer. I kept saying I didn't want any attachments to ex, I wanted to forego the alimony. She said no way, and I did end up getting open durational alimony, since we were married nearly 30 years. It's not much, but he literally did rob me blind of my mom's inheritance, so I have no qualms at all about receiving it. I set up to have payments manually taken out of his paycheck, the county probation department coordinates that. He's two weeks in arrears, due to the time it took to set up the automatic deductions, but I'm not worrying about that. The probation department will work that out with him. I think he's been blowing them off, they'll get the money with or without his assistance. Get automatic deductions, that's the single smartest thing I did. He of course didn't want it, but it was not his call.

Don't worry too much about the BS that comes out of his mouth right now, he's probably speaking from an emotional place. Learn your rights from online sources, your lawyer, others who have been through a divorce. My ex left documents on the computer telling his lawyer things that he would absolutely not agree to, and guess what? He doesn't get to decide what's "fair". The courts decide what will happen. Just make sure you have a good attorney who can present the best case to his lawyer (for negotiations) and the judge, and any advisory panels you might be put in front of.

Remember, you're not to blame for standing up for yourself. To think so is so immature of him.

Thank you all for your words of encouragement! I love this support! Things aren't nearly as stressful when you've got someone to share them with. I hope you all have a great weekend!!

Watch out for yourself, we are often vulnerable and
Needy during this time. My lawyer watched my back
Legally and financially. I was in no Condition to think
Clearly.

You feel Like a hormonal teenager when your grieving
and its Hard to think straight or rational. Lawyers look at
things a lot Differently, she thought about my Future and
what was in my best interest, HUGS

Ok. Thanks. I think I have an excellent lawyer. I will listen to her. HUGS

Get every year you can. You can always change you mind later and change the deal but if you give it up in the beginning, you will never get it back. You don't know what kind of crud he will pull in the future, you may need the income. Take what you deserve and what the law allows.

Yes it will all work out in your favor because cheats rarely if ever prosper.

If you are entitled to 12 then go for 12, you owe him nothing, he owes you 12, along with an apology for wasting your loving time with him, better spent with me, I mean with someone more worthy of.

Danceintherain is right, I have yet to know her never to be.