I want so much to be optimistic for this new year. To leave behind the pain and anger that have been my heart and soul for a majority of 2016. To accept that it is what it is. To let go and let God. I don't know why this has to be so hard. Once I realized that he wasn't who he pretended to be and once I realized that the "love" wasn't what he claimed it to be, why didn't that push me to just get over this? What is there to hold on to? It's more like it won't let go of me. It's not like he's trying to get me back or anything like that. There's just something that is constantly taunting me and tormenting me that I can't shake. I do have a handful of people who have been trying to support me through this, yet I still feel so alone. I'm so detached from everything. I come on here and try to chime in where I can. It's always easier looking from the outside. I do pray everyday and lean on the Lord to get me through this. I just want to get passed this horrible place that, in truth, has changed me. I thank you all for sharing your stories and insight and for being so brave to endure the struggle everyday, every moment, and still continue pressing on. As hard as it may be, we have to believe that it will get better. Don't wish this on anyone, but grateful for meeting new people. New year, new year.