So, I was going to make this a blog post, but I decided to post it out here so maybe it might help some others. If you want my original story, go to the thread called "Need Help" and read it there.

So onto today.....I have been having some great days lately!! Thanks to a lot of people on here, and thanks to my stubborness and willingness to "Just Say No," more on that in a bit. I am a little over 2 months out of separation and about 2 weeks out from the official divorce. That being said, I knew it was coming for a while (6+ months) and so I had some time to prepare. But things are going good. I struggled over the weekend, I curled up on the couch and couldn't get off it on Saturday. Didn't sleep well Saturday night, but when I woke up Sunday, something clicked! I got up and rode 8 miles on my bike, then golfed 9 holes and hiked 2 miles. It was a good day!! There was some motivation behind it though.....Last week, my ex actually admitted that she had started seeing someone and was going to introduced our boys to him on Sunday, hence why I was so active and my struggles on Saturday. But, it was very effective!!

Over the past few days I've realized a few things. If I continue to let thoughts of her, what she did, how she treated me and everything else continue to eat away at me, I was just going to slip deeper into depression. I decided to fight back. I decided that it was time for me to do me, to not let her control me anymore. I know that it's very hard to flip that switch, but I promise it will happen for everyone in time, and the feeling after it happens is tremendous. I challenge everyone on here who speaks of "missing" there ex, hating them, being mad at them or whatever to let go. If you hold onto those feelings, they will control your life if you let them. You have to make the change, you have to stand up to your emotions and take control. It is hard, very hard, but inside each of us is a warrior that can control themselves!! I know you all can do it, I know it!!

You would think I would be mad that she told me this week that she was going away on a fishing trip over the weekend with her new boyfriend. I like fishing, I asked her to go many times and she never wanted to. You would think that would make me upset. But you know what, I wished her the best in her new relationship because I realized that if she's doing that, it means that I get 2 extra days with my boys this weekend. And really what's more important? Worrying and getting upset about her actions OR getting even more time with the two little lights of my life? That makes it very easy!!

There is always another side to every thought, the challenge is getting to that other side. Whenever you have a thought and get upset, think about the other side of the thought and realize that's better for you. I know I will have some more setbacks, I realize that and I'm not ignoring it, I'm expecting it, but I know that I can also handle it, and if I have issue I can always come here and seek support from everyone!! So thank you everyone for all your help so far, and I'm always here for anyone if you need to talk.