Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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girlonfire 05/19/2017

It's been a week since I've completely blocked my ex and today is Friday...which means he might be hanging out with his coworker who he said he might be interested in hanging out with. I went to her when I couldn't reach him, and she blocked me on Facebook then contacted him saying "I never got to say goodbye" when he left that job and got a new job. I want to throw up, because they tried to meet before and she was busy, but now that I'm finally out of his life, I know he's going to pursue her. When we were hanging out for a while, I asked if he was going to talk to her anymore, and he told me no. He said, if I talk to her, then I won't have a chance with you...but then started texting again when she said she needed career advice. Bullshit. Some women can be so manipulative. He says I'm crazy and I give him too much pressure, but that he loves me but why won't he try then? It's taking everything in me not to go over to his place. I feel sick.

kbbcoop77 05/19/2017

It's best not to know what exes are up to. It really keeps you STUCK. Don't focus on them focus on YOU. What he does now is irrelevant ...i agonized over my ex and her antics until I finally accepted it and went total no contact and moved the F on..! Takes time but it's the only way

girlonfire 05/19/2017

Yeah, for a long time, I couldn't stop contacting him and texting him, but now I've blocked him for a week and it's the first weekend, and it's killing me. It's killing me imagining that he's going to hang out with her and possibly do something more. I can't stand it. I want to curl up and die, because I know if I go over there, this entire week that I resisted contacting him or going over there will be for nothing.

girlonfire 05/19/2017

I don't know what to do with myself....

girlonfire 05/19/2017

I tried to talk to my mom and she said, "I don't understand why you're like this. you need to change yourself from the inside out. You need inner healing." Like what?? DUH. But I can't just change myself and my emotions. If I could, I wouldn't fucking be talking to you or reaching out because I need help!!! I can't stand it!!!! She's never been able to understand, because she's cold as ice!!

JPM 05/19/2017

@girlonfire I suggest you take on some activity ideal a sport something that makes you feel good, join a group with similar interests as you, get a book or watch a movie .You need to stop your mind going back there you need to block those thoughts !! There is a book (also available on audio for immediate download) called solve for happy from Mo Gawdad , I found it very helpful to control your thoughts. I do not know how is your relation with God but He is the one that can give you the strength needed during this difficult moments . I just prayed for you! You'll come out of this a better you!!

girlonfire 05/19/2017

@JPM thank you so much for the prayers! Yes, I'm Christian. I just thought about taking some sleeping pills, but I don't want to feel like I gave up. I just don't want to feel this anymore. I'm listening to sermons, eating well, trying to take care of myself, but it's so hard. I booked an appointment with a psychiatrist next tuesday, and I'm hoping I can get some pills. I can't do this right now.

Ghostdancer 05/19/2017

Depression and anxiety from breakups is very debilitating. I gave up on Facebook once ex began mining my friend list to enlist them on her side of the breakup. Awww well sorts thru friends enemies and frenimies pretty quickly overall. Not been back to Facebook since and with divorce within two weeks still undecided on the value of it to return. Peace and prayers to help carry you through an otherwise hopeless time.

Kcamp 05/19/2017

I went through this, and each time I contacted my stbx, it made it much worse. I would be in so much pain and I missed him so much, I thaught if I just let him know how I feel he would understand how much I love him and maybe we could work on our marriage. Well all it did was make him pull away more, which made me sink further into despair.
So as hard as it is to go no contact, it allows you to hold on to some of your dignity and gain back some control. It will get easier. I pray God give you strength and clarity to see that you deserve better then someone that hurts you. People who love us don't hurt us......

bridgie101 05/19/2017

EW girlonfire hang on in there! OMG. here we all are... reach out to us. Don't go near that guy. Here. let me tie you down and feed you alcohol and bad movies... or anything.

Just anything to get past this. I have so totally been there and if you don't stop yourself going over there, then it will get ugly, and humiliating, and you'll learn not to go near an ex simply by virtue of degrading yourself beyond description and going away without a shred of dignity left.

She says, from experience.

So you just drown those sorrows. I tend to use bad movies. Give me predator or zombieland any day to drown those sorrows. In fact, I think it's time to watch Alien again.

girlonfire 05/19/2017

@ghostdancer thank you so much for the prayers

@kcamp what you said is so true - people who love us don't hurt us. I just need to remember that. He used to always say things to me like...oh maybe we should travel here or there....and then take it back if he wasn't in the mood or whatever.

@bridgie101 Ha, thanks for the smiles. Yeah, going over there was so humiliating. I was just constantly convincing him that I love him and he should be with me, even after he said he didn't want to be with me or see himself marrying me. I do feel more control now that I've blocked him for a week, but it's a struggle. I feel like a guy should prove his love to me - not the other way around! I'm a woman for christ's sake! He should be chasing me. I never thought I would stoop so low. He would say really mean things to me and I just took it, because I wanted to show him i love him. uhg....

sjs777 05/20/2017

take a step back - read my journals to gain some insight in relationship dynamics and the part each person plays as we interact with each other. always feel free to reach out any time you wish

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