breathe girl.
Just breathe.

It really could be that reality is hitting him.

Whatever happens don't settle.

And please do not drive yourself crazy with this today. You won't figure it out by yourself and not in a day.
Stick to your guns about counseling.

It's amazing to me how badly we can be treated to the point of wanting out, but when the realization hits you in the face that you really might be without this person for the rest of your life--you go running back to them. Really think about what YOU want. This happened to me, we reconciled for 2 years and then it all when downhill again. That's the point I decided to call it quits. Listen to your gut feeling, that is the one thing in my life Ive learned to trust. Good luck

I agree! Stick to your gut feelings. Decide if you want to stay on this emotional roller coaster for the rest of your life or if you can get something better. Live your life for you since that is the person who will definately be with you forever!

I think counselling is always a good thing no matter what happens or what the outcome.

people grasp to the familiar. who can understand why people stay where they feel they're being used and abused? they don't know any other way.

those who break free should see, but some of them too return to familiar waters

Please read my journal -- I made an attempt at reconciliation, and it is waaaaay harder than anyone imagines. There is the risk of more hurt and pain (which was my experience!). On the other hand, not trying may lead to regrets. Everyone and every situation is different, so you really need to take some time, listen to your heart, and determine what is best for YOU -- not him, not family, etc. In the end, I don't regret my decision because now I know for sure!

this couple were getting divorced and were back living together to reconcile....
http://gothamist.com/2007/12/08/during_fire_mar.php#comments

I think I'll just continue my procedings and say 'NO thanks' if STBX suggests trying to reconcile

the only way to agree to this is if you will be clear with yourself that you are prepared for failure of the exersise. if you put all your hopes into it again and if it won't work, your hurt will be same strong, or even stronger, because right now you are too fragile. Go for it if you feel enough strength in you to take whatever result will come out. BE STRONG

Thank you all for your comments. I have this "gut" feeling that if we get back together, I would regret it.

I think my excitability is that he is thinking about the counseling.

I know, either way, the counseling will be good for us.

Thank you all, again.

Tell him that it is great that he wants to counseling and after he has had a few sessions you can go to see his counselor, but you don't have to go together at first. Then if you want, and the counselor thinks it is productive, you could both go. I might be good for the closure. My leader at Divorce Care did that and said she learned a lot that way.

Do whatever seem right to you. You are the only person you have to answer to in the end. Good luck!