After nearly 2 1/2 years of separation, repeated abusive attacks from the ex, and more stress than I thought I could deal with, I'm free! The only part that really sucks is picking up the pieces. I'm just glad to finally be able to start living again. No more dictator looming over our heads yelling, interrogating, threatening, cursing... when push came to shove, he was like a bully on the playground, limping off to nurse his wounds crying like a baby. He showed up at the divorce hearing for no reason, as he and his lawyer had signed everything in advance. The judge asked why he was there and he replied, "I'm here for closure." The judge said, " Well Mr. XXXX, that is just what you'll get in about 10 minutes!" My lawyer and I just looked at each other and had to hold back a laugh! A few weeks later, the ex called to harass me about not calling him in a "timely manner" about incidents that involve the children. (son fell and needed stitches, daughter got jumped by some bullies) I had to hang up on him because he started with his demeaning put downs and ugly attitude. He left me a couple of threatening messages on voice mail. After listening I took a deep breath and called him back. I told him in no uncertain terms that if he has an issue regarding the children, that he is to speak respectfully to me, with out threats and name calling. To be direct and too the point, "I feel that you should be contacting me in a more timely manner regarding incidents involving the children." Then I apologized for not doing so. He also apologized, but it was laced with sarcasm... he's never going to get it. But I don't have to take it anymore, and the more I stand up for myself, the stronger I become!