We all have those moments, and it's perfectly natural. I had those urges and succumbed to them several times and to no good end. I was ignored. No response. So I think you are right in your assessment about it prolonging the hurt.

I also found myself constantly checking my phones for texts or voice mails and facebook & email for messages. Finally I decided enough was enough and I blocked her on everything. Phones, email and facebook. Then I left her a voicemail indicating I had crossed my personal rubicon, there was no going back, and that I blocked her so she shouldn't attempt to contact me. The last remaining hope on my part was extinguished.

Now the blockings and voicemail I left her were probably moot points, but it did two things for me: 1) Stopped me from hoping for her to reach out to me, as I knew she couldn't; 2) If there was a glimmer of reconciliation in her mind, it snuffed it out. I guess it also made me feel I regained a certain amount of control and self-respect.

Wise answer - above......it shows that you can truly move on, but checking for text, emails etc etc.....shows you are still in mourning for this relationship. That WILL take time, if you have really loved someone. It is bereavement, is it not? Be strong, if you can, and dont reach out to her. XXXXX

We do all have those moment. It gets easier with time to not give into them. just remind yourself you are better off not talking to them.

Hope you got some sleep. The no contact gets easier as time goes and then you realise how it really helped you.

Thanks for your replies and support. I know it's best to have no contact, and trying hard to stick to it. This breakup is so new, and I still fantasize that we can reconcile. I don't know if I can block her out completely yet. I feel that I need to leave the door ajar. And of course this is prolonging the pain, and I wish I could stop. I keep saying that she knows how to get in touch with me if she wants to.

I am trying to wean off on sleep medication, and didn't take any last night. I dozed off for about 3 hours. I feel ok right now. Actually, I feel better than last night. Very glad that I didn't contact her. Today is a brand new day.

good for you.....and each day without contact you will grow stronger. It is best that way, even IF you get together for any reason, you will know that you can survive independently of her and that is just sooo important..((hug))

You did the right thing fighting the urge. It gets easier with time. Keeping busy is the key. When you find the urge to call again, pick up the phone and call a friend or someone to vent to. Get on here and find someone to instant message. Hang in there. Hugs.

Pain, hurt and feelings are all triggered responses to what we once felt. Just like a recovering Alcoholic, once loved Alcohol yet can not touch a drop even though they drank every night. So is departing from a loved one. Its not what you are feeling now that you respond to, it is what you once did. Kinda like a friend or a co-worker who you were fond of then betrays your friendship, you still have fond memories, but that's all they can be is memories. Our brains are very funny we can learn all sorts of cool stuff, but try and try and we can we can not unlearn stuff. Memory reflexes are amazing part of life, they make us remember the first puppy we had that licked us, and it is also what reminds us of heart ache, and pain. Life is very short, so short... that one must not take to much time on focusing on pain. Life becomes what we live in it, not whom we live with. I often tell friends of mine, who would you be 150 years ago without all lives influences? This will tell you where your passions are to help recover from pain.