Sorry it sucks, I know that feeling....how could they just throw away all we had?

That's why they say divorce is the same if not worse than grieving the loss of a loved one.

It's hard to come to closure.

One day at a time..

Hugs to you!

Big Giant Teddy Bear Hugs!!We are here for u.U can talk to any of us.I found that helping others on here and journaling my feelings really helped.If u havent thought of seeing a counselor or close friend to talk to, u might.Im here most of the time.sincerely luci

Thanks Julie. I see you know exactly how I feel right now. I can suck it up and not cry about it...but, It still feels bad in my stomach. It's a stupid ass place to be...

I know that feeling too. My divorce was final last Wed and I still have the sick feeling in my stomach. Big hugs to you!!!!!

Thanks for the welcome Luci. It's not great to be here...but you people are nice, so maybe it is?...

cdpulani...sorry your stomach feels like crap. how long did it take you from start to divorce? i'm just wondering what to expect...thanks...

These first few weeks consist of feeling that you can't do anything but feel that sick pit in your stomach. One guy described it as bleeding from your rib, and I think that is pretty accurate. This time is about extremes, highs and lows. The highs are euphoric, because you stop hurting for a few minutes, and then wow, this is what it feels like not to feel pain, and then wham, it comes back with a vengeance, and cripples us again. It is going to take some time before you are in the valley, and you say ok, there is the mountain, I am going to start climbing that sucker. When we get through the sorrow, sadness phase, some of us hit anger, and that can be beneficial at times. There are going to be days like this, but I promise you, that the good days will come, and one day they will stay. Just keep feeling the hurt, cry, lament, say what if, and then wipe your tears, and fake it until you make it. We have all walked the path, and will keep walking it with you. Big ole healing hugs. Kimmee

its been just under 3 months since my wife broke up with me/ broke me.
the mood swings and churning stomach are still there, but less frequent and severe
it still hurts, every day but slowly things do start to get better and you think more clearly, hell i even smile again now
the more i talk or type about it the better i feel, you have to let it out

Dude..Im not going to hug you, but I really feel for you. I know exactly just what you are feeling now...you are not alone.

The pain you are feeling is the tearing of your soul through divorce/separation. It will take time to heal, there is no easy way. Rest assured that your ex is feeling the same, even if it may not seem so. No-one escapes the pain!!

Im listening to Hillsong ( gospel worship group) right now and the gnawing feeling in the pit of my stomach is slowly being uplifted.

Regards
Ricky

I am about at the same place you are right now only I have a lot more years of marriage to oevercome.

My son was killed 5 years ago and I have to tell you that this pain, for me, is worse than his death. His death was final, but my husband is still walking, talking,and breathing. I see him every day if only for a few minutes. He doesn't want to leave.

REBUILDING by Alberti/fisher is about $15 on amazon. (Sacling the rebuilding pyramid through 19 stages denial, anger, etc.)

I have read it 3 times while going through what you are going through. I did the exercises and tried to continue to evaluate where I was in the pyramid. If you are a thinker, this might help take your mind off of the pain and look at the bigger picture in rebuilding a new life (the pyramid).

It will get better but it hurts badly in the beginning. We all wish there was a way to bypass the pain. I never found any short cuts on my continuing journey to the top of the pyramid.

Best Wishes, RR99

Oh, I'm so sorry. It really sucks when that happens. It's like you're going through your normal day, moving on with your life, and then your mind betrays you. I've been there and so far the only cure is time.

i call this the devastation/dying phase. for me it started getting better around the start of month 4. the mind going from one thing to the next so quickly is normal. the roller coaster of emotion goes so darn fast and you can't seem to get off for a while. it's a long ride. but, your in the right place. coming here and posting and journaling is so very helpful, you have to give it a try. we all know the pain your going through. for all the newcomers that come here, eventually truly feel that there is an end to this. i wish i could tell you how long, i can't. just the support and encouragement alone is phenominal. then the friends you make and the hugs and love from these people is something that you won't be able to fathom until your there, and you will be there. you are grieving the loss of your relationship. what your going through is normal. feels crappy, i know. i promise you, stick with us, there will come a time when you start to feel better. (((HUGS)))xoxoxoxo