Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I have my marriage cert in a box. We are still married and separated for almost 2 years now.
That marriage certificate didn't keep him faithful, it didn't help to have him honor or respect for me, it didn't help me honor or respect him (once he cheated I had no respect for him). It didn't keep him working so he could provide for our family. It didn't mean anything to him that it should have. I am having such a hard time letting it go tho. WHY?? I know why, I have issues, serious, painful issues. I don't want to be with him, I don't even like him. He's so lost in his own selfish world there isn't anything left of the person I fell in love with and married. He NEVER thinks of me or our daughter first. He didn't keep any promise he ever made. I'm still crying over this fool. I still can't let go of that worthless piece of paper that means nothing. UGH!!!! Sorry, just a bad few days!!
That marriage certificate didn't keep him faithful, it didn't help to have him honor or respect for me, it didn't help me honor or respect him (once he cheated I had no respect for him). It didn't keep him working so he could provide for our family. It didn't mean anything to him that it should have. I am having such a hard time letting it go tho. WHY?? I know why, I have issues, serious, painful issues. I don't want to be with him, I don't even like him. He's so lost in his own selfish world there isn't anything left of the person I fell in love with and married. He NEVER thinks of me or our daughter first. He didn't keep any promise he ever made. I'm still crying over this fool. I still can't let go of that worthless piece of paper that means nothing. UGH!!!! Sorry, just a bad few days!!
When I was prepping for the burning event I had posted about it on this board and said I was burning EVERYTHING with the exception of my rings (I'm not stupid...I sold those :) )
Anyways...one of the elders on this board advised me not to burn my marriage licenses as it is a legal document and I might need proof of the marriage one day (something about if he died and social security).
So my advice is to tuck the license away with other legal documents and forget about it. Of course I know you just can't forget about it and what you are feeling isn't about the piece of paper.
Is there a reason why you are still legally married? To me a two year long separation is a long time and it sounds like there is no hope for reconciliation. I would imagine it would be hard to move forward in many aspects of your life while you are still married.
Sorry that two years later you are still in so much pain, hugs to you.
I removed or replaced everything I could to make me forget about the past.
I'd put the marriage cert in a box, put the box out of sight, (attic, closet, under the bed) and forget about it as much as possible.
Worry about what to do with those types of items when you are ready and have moved on (moved on is the important part right now) no need to put that kind of pressure on yourself.
Marriage and divorce are contracts. This is business and not personal.