I would have to say neither also. It started out with lust and we didn't develop much of a relationship and he didn't feel the need to go after it as much once he could have it any time he wanted it.

Nothing - a big nothing. I don't even think we liked each other.

Initially it was both than it became more like just love and than it mutated into this thing I did not recongize...habit.

I have observed that a lot of relationships based on lust have a high drama factor. Lots of intense fights to further the pleasure of making up, i guess.

I never envied the jealousy ridden dramatic bedroom oriented relationships of my acquaintances, but have to admit, after having my dear and trusted husband turn on me like a rabid coyote, for the sake of his "passion" for this unbelievable character of a prostitute that constitutes his sexual addiction... guess he needed and wanted the drama. He has certainly created plenty.

We are all different finally. I never met the man or had the attraction during my marriage that was profound enough to have me even consider betraying the loyalty and devotion I had for my spouse. The first woman he bought, he threw me over for. I freely admit one of the most troubling aspects of his behavior for me is the mercenary aspect. How can you trust the affection you must purchase? But he surely deserves that level of devotion, based on his treatment of me.... perhaps all happens as it should...

Who can really fathom the secrets of the human heart. But try we must.....It is good to examine these things, to lift them for observation and inspection, to shake them gently to discover meaning....

I think ours started as lust (we were just kids really)... but I definitely loved deeply in time. It turns out he is not capable of loving another so it was one-sided love and probably stayed in the "lust" mode for him.... makes sense now why he could just walk away...((sigh))

I will say that with the "dixie chick" we never argued, never had a fight, we had the PASSION...the LUST... the LOVE and I found out later the LOVE was deep.....she moved away mostly to see if I would come after her, testing me......I didn't... I found out after we both had married that we both felt that we F'ED up....If I find it again I will never let that happen again.....

I love(d) and lust(ed) for my STBX. I blindly loved him. He could do anything, say anything and be anything and I would take it and love him. I used to think he was the most beautiful man I had ever met. I only wish I had had the amount of therapy I do know when I met him. I believe my choices would've been dramatically different. But yes, there was love and lust there for me. I can't speak for him.

Ours was loving, but very one-sided I now see. When I asked him if he loved me when he married me, he said, "I was too young to know what love was." He also told me he loved me "at times during the marriage."

So yes, very one sided. And where there is no love, how can there be lust?

I loved her throughout. I was taken back when I first met her, there was just something about her I liked, then we fell in love rather quickly. Yea there was lust and romance for quite a while. Then after we'd been married a while and had kids, I wasn't so much "in heat" after her but loved her in a whole new way and was still very attracted to her.

I don't know about her. I know she loved me once upon a time, but things from her end of the marriage have been a mystery for so long, I just don't know how she feels about me.

Definitely both at first. We loved and adored each other at couldn't take our hands off each other. I don't think we really ever stopped loving each other, but there was no lust. I agree that it starts to settle into something of comfort. That's probably when you need to put more work in.
Wow Melin - anytime he wanted it? I couldn't get it on my birthday. I tried all the time. If you can't get it on your birthday you can't get it at all. Woe is me.

In the beginning, we had both love and lust.

Time and responsibilities eroded the lust portion. I don't believe you feel the same way, physically, about a person that you felt about them 10 years ago without work. We stopped working at it.

Love is there even to this day on both of our parts. We're not going to be buddies after this experience, but I'm just not very good at working up a total hatred for her.

I guess things got to the point where I just didn't light her fire anymore. And to an extent, yeah, she stopped lighting my fire a while ago now that I think about it.

Friendship, lust, love and then he fucked up.

THE END

In the beginning it was pure lust and we felt like we were just meant for each other...sex all the time, in every room, in every way.
So, I knew I had to marry this woman. I mean it wasn't going to get any better than that, right? Then the stress of everday life started to come in the picture...bills, work, kids...etc...
Then the arguing began, the sex diminished and the relationship failed.
So to answer your question, it started out as pure lust, which I interpreted as love and which turned to hate. Now my days are spent on DS, talking about tacos and shit...wtf?

Hi Jaken.

S'okay Rman,

I am certain I STILL don't know what love is.