I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. It isn't fair. However, you're going through the grieving process and he already did, however long ago. As difficult as it is to accept that he's gone, he is not coming back and you have your whole life with your daughter ahead of you. Start writing in a journal about what you want your new life to look like when you're happy again; get into therapy (if not already); access your support network; try Divorce Care. Try to focus on doing fun things with your daughter. Do whatever it takes to find something, anything, positive to think about. And consider getting a smaller house payment---you can refinance or eventually move to a smaller place. Hugs:)

Does he not want to see his daughter? I don't understand why men can just get up and leave. My husband has not exactly left her but told me he wants to separate but acts normal around the kids. I'm the one falling apart in the corner after hearing he doesn't love me and doesn't want to be with me. And when he goes away to work I'm the one getting questions from the kids why daddy isn't around. It is so unfair! All I want to do is scream, "He's not here because he doesn't care about anyone except forefore himself! He can say he stayed for the kids all these years but his actions not say he doesn't give a damn."

I know exactly how you feel. These people are incredibly selfish. I find that there are them and then us. We would never leave no matter how bad it was but them they can and will leave in a heartbreak. Suicide is such a real real thought in my head right now. I know it takes a ton of courage to live when you want to die.

I know that words fall short in times like these. I am sorry to hear that you are going through this. It's crazy to think that after we put so much into something, the results are things like this. It seems that you knew this wasn't good for you. I would say that the reason you're going through these emotions is because of all the time you've invested. For a long time this was your life, good or bad. Now you have to figure out what that's going to look like moving forward. It's okay not to know because it's not something that you can figure out right away. This is your life we're talking about, you and your daughter's. Try to think of a plan that you can work out through small goals to get you to the place that you would like to see yourself. This is a process. You have to allow yourself the room to heal properly, again, whatever that may look like for you. Whether in the relationship or not, there will be things that you would have to figure out and manage. Might as well let it be the things that are going to eventually work out for you and your daughter's good. Let this be a new beginning. "Beginning. Just let that word wash over you." (quote from a song). For me, all I can do is continue to bring it all to God. I pray for better days for us all. We have to believe that this will get better. - Hugs

I am so sorry for your situation. I understand the feeling of loneliness does create anxiety which results in pain. But remember you are never alone, http://bit.ly/2g3w3wo, here is a link to a resource that can show you this fact is true. Loneliness is a reaction to fear, fear of the unknown, what do I need to do now, what can I do. Who can I turn to for help. The answer is your help comes from within and building relationships strengthens us in our walk. The fear comes from not forgiving because you feel like when you forgive you are saying the other person did nothing wrong. That is not true at all the other person did, but you forgiving them, gives you the ability to let go of the pain that was caused in you. The other person will have to build trust with you if a relationship must continue, but you don't have to carry the pain. Christ teaches us that when we forgive others, we get the benefit. Here is a link http://bit.ly/1xCRqYC on forgiveness.