KTs, it sounds like this idiot has been stringing you along for years! Let me give you a brief describe of my reason change of events it will cheer you up! Its not over for you sweety, don't feel this way.
Me: I met this guy 5 years ago, he strung me along off and on. One he told me that 2 girls claim to be preggos by him. He did have it going on, we both do. Young, successful, good catches. He was on his high horse. I cannot tell you how devastated I was. Then, after he played me for the million times but promising to come see me, say "hi mom" to my mom over chat! I had my brother try and get him a discount hotel room. Then, boom I'm waiting for him to tell me when he's coming, he dissed me.
- I said enough is enough 2 months ago and ended it, I told him to leave me alone I'm ready to settle down and get married, and didn't need him in my life messing over me. I say in my living and give a heart desire out to the universe, to send me a man ready to settle down get married, kids, live the life! Then, I briefly remembered a guy that asked me for a courtship and wondered about him, then released the thought and wish into the universe. 3 DAYS later he contacted me. Asked me for a courtship again, then asked me to be his gf, we talked marriage, kids, him and I have tons in comment. He checks off my list of desires, and he's rich! I thought that other loser was all that, and now I really met the catch of my dreams. It can happen for you too, this is just a blessing in disguise, hang in there, its time to really think about what you want!

Fyi: those girls were never preggos they just thought he was all that.
But my guy now its really ALL that and such a blessing! Trust in God, and the Universe, YouTube s movie called "the secret"!

Thank you @Spr167 - I feel so hopeless right now and like I'll never have the life I want. I'm so impressed with your strength to move forward. I hope to be more like you. You seem amazing! I'm so scared that I'll be miserable forever... it's so hard to make up and be sad that I'm still alive. I'm praying I love forward - and I'm greatful for people like you who have what they deserve.

* sorry for all the typos lol hope you understood.

You cannnn do this trust me! I was devastated. Devastation after Devastation. Then I remembered my friend sayingbthe same thing I said to you " its time really think about what you want!" The Law of Attraction is real and it works! I'm in a relationship with a millionaire, lol! It can happen for you too. Your on the right path, practicing graditute!

Wow, I've watched the Secret but don't feel it could happen to me. Maybe I should give it to.... yes, I feel ya. "Devistation after devistation" that's a wonderful way to put it. I'm going to give the law of attraction a go. We'll see. It's hard to get out of bed right now so I'm going to work on it

Yayy, so you saw the movie! See that's why we attracted eachother. It does work and works for everyone. The missing piece to making the Law of Attraction very effective is reprogramming your subconscious mind. Since your in bed anyways, lol, YouTube or purchase ( I purchased it so I could listen to it in my sleep) Universal Mind 1 & 2 by Kelly Howell! They are the most powerful reprogramming programs I have used, everything I think I attract to me. Its awesome

I haven't heard if those! Thank you. I'm so glad you're on here. I'll watch these now!

Sure no problem, there mediations you listen to them with headphones. I usually listen to them on low to by pass the conscious mind. But for you first listen you can hear what she's saying then for reprogramming listen on low! Enjoy, changes start occuring pretty fast!

It sounds like Spr167 hit the nail on the head. Our way of thinking needs to change so that we change the words we speak. I've learned that faith is speaking things that are not as though they were. But in order to believe what we speak, our minds need to be renewed. For instance, you may feel like your self-esteem is gone. But in reality, it's still there, just covered by a wound. I would challenge and encourage you to focus on how you are fearfully and wonderfully made! There is someone made for you, but don't go about seeking it out. Work on yourself first. Learn how to be comfortable being single! That is where you will learn to have confidence for your next relationship. Praying you find comfort and truth :) ((HUGS))

I'm sorry for your pain! I'd like to pass along a book recommendation. Right now I'm reading "F*CK Him! - Nice Girls Always Finish Single". It is very empowering. I hope you are already following the no-contact rule and have blocked this ex-boyfriend from your phone, email, and all social media. You deserve to be treated with respect. We're into the best part of summer in North America - so get outside, soak up some Vitamin D, and spend time doing the things you love, with people in your life who make you a priority.