Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Ok, so I have known my husband for 10 years, married just shy of 8. He was my best friend, like the guy who was "perfect". I met him before he started medical school. I've been on this medical journey since day 1. We have one son. We relocated right before my son was born. No family, no support. My sex drive was like non-existent because I had self-esteem issues. It was few and far between. We had one conversation about it that I can remember, that was about 6-8 months ago. Fast forward to present day and now I am told he was feeling inadequate for 5-6 years and he gave 100% to make me happy. I just thought we were happy and damn was I lucky. I have never cheated, always faithful. Always found him attractive, just had zero drive. Post partum is awful!! We keep on peeling layers of our onion and it's like we are two people who didn't know each other, most importantly, two people who are bad at communicating! I have an appointment consultation this Friday with an attorney to discuss how things work in my state. We have discussed and yelled at nauseum and it's likely the end of the road for us, so very sadly. Thanks for reading .....
First if you guys have not tried marriage therapy I would suggest that. Having a unbiased third party help you guys address issues could make a huge difference. The problem with this is both parties have to be willing and committed for it to work. Also, go in knowing that these issues developed over time and will take time to fix. There is no magic pill.
If you are past that point then you need to realize some things. If you guys are bad at communicating then you are probably right you did become two people that didn't know each other. We grow and change daily and if we don't continue to share consistently then we grow apart. We no longer know what the other person needs from us and they don't know what we need or desire from them.
One thing to remember is that blame is useless and will only make things worse. If you blame him then the anger you feel inside will destroy you and blaming yourself is even more damaging. Another thing to remember is that your child deserves the best of both of you. Don't bad mouth him in front of the child. Even if your child is too young to understand now, it is a hard habit to break later. Also, they pick up on atmospheres and tensions even if they don't know what is being said. Most importantly find yourself some support. If there is no friends or family to call on then find a counselor or therapist. Or reach out to those of us on the site though you may not get instant feedback. The key to remember is that you can't bottle it up or you'll explode. It will be rough for awhile but you will make it.
You deserve to be happy. To feel loved. You are worthy of that and so much more. Prayers and Love.
I know it’s painful, but it will get easier, just not right away to be honest unfortunately. I had to tell myself that I would just expect to be heartbroken and miserable for awhile rather than being disappointed when I woke every am and wanted to vomit. Lol it’s hard to explain, but it helps to let yourself grieve.
I am happy to talk with you.
Going through a breakup now with a lot of other things and this site helps I think.