I'm going through the exact same. Breaking up feels bad. And it's my first two years relationship. You have to not to contact him or talk. Try not to beg. It will look unattractive and devalued. Now go on for a month without talking. Do it for yourself. Move on ahead. He will regret and come back to you if you remained no talking to him. I'm doing this right now. But for me I'm not sure to take back a cheater or not.

Be strong. Lose touch with him. Try to make yourself happy for yourself. Why are we relying on others to make us happy it doesn't make any sense. Love hurts but temporary. Just focus on healing

The no contact thing I get what you are saying. It is impossible. We have a 9 month old son together and we work together. So I will see him all of the time even after he moves out in 10 days. Getting a new job is not in the cards. I have a career there. I have been there for 5 years Working for the State, not something I can just walk away from. And I can't just keep the baby from him, I mean I could, but that would just be out of spite and not healthy for our son either.

I hope all goes well today with the therapist, thats
not good You two work together.

Limited contact is when you keep communications
Only about the financials and child care or concerns.
No personal chit chatting, no texting and calling. Send
Informative emails or texts only. Its no contact really
Its Just keeping limits so you can heal and get clarity
And the big one and hard one emotionally DETACH
From him. HUGS

I have been dealing with this to how to keep your distance from him but at the same time have kids and have to communicate about them. What I'm doing currently is just waiting for him to text me first I'm no longer the one to try to come in contact with him. So hard to do but I don't want to look desperate either. I feel for you having to work with him on top of everything else , how do you do it?

It is very hard. I can barely keep myself together at work. He actually had some nerve to have one of the doctors we work with notorize the custody paper he filed against me too. I am certain that is a conflict of interest. I try not to involve people at work in our personal business, but he sure had no problem doing so. Especially a doctor that I have to work with directly. I am an RN there so there is no avoiding this doctor. He is a program worker and everyone there just thinks he is the absolute best person ever. So nice they say. I am so lucky to have ended up with him. Ha, if they only knew his true colors. He is so quick to do for everyone else, that he has neglected home and is willing to walk out on us. Bet he didn't tell them that. I am sure he has told them I am the cause of all of this. That it is me. I pushed him to do it.

Christi i would give up thinking he is going To
regret anything. When they have emotionally
Checked out they are long gone. They generally
already have Bonded with another partner.

My ex has no regret Or concern, he was already long
Gone, into his new chapter Of his new life. He might
hold some guilt and shame. No regret except for his
financial consequences. Watch your back financially
with this guy.

Its all about his lack of character and integrity
Not yours. HUGS

I guess the thing that is bothering me a lot is that I don't know if there is someone else. I don't know in what time there could be. He only goes to work and then home. If there is someone else it is via the phone. Unless it is at work. He will occasionally go on a bike ride, but that is in the morning, he doesn't shower before hand and goes in workout clothes that are less than appealing and comes back sweaty in the same clothes and shoes me his route on his phone. I don't know. I put it in my head that it had to be someone else for him to give up his family, but I don't know.

Christi i hope for your sake he does not
Have someone lined up, many like a nice
Soft landing after they are emotionally
Checked out and don't care anymore.

Yours it could be he can not cope with
Having a baby around. He probably would
Never admit it.

The rest is just the financials and child care
Issues. Take care of you and your children,
It will be healthier for you after he leaves.

I am sad for You that you work with him.
I could not imagine Facing That level of
hurt, pain and betrayal every day.

That would be a nightmare to someone
like Me. HUGS

You need to limit your talking with him as much as possible. Only talk about the essentials. Do not show warmth toward him or he will see that you're still interested. Focus on your own well-being and self-healing. Only when you are whole and happy will you be able to make a good decision about whether to let him back into your life later on.

I know these feelings. As for me, I don't necessarily want him to hurt, but I want him to care. I think, however, that their one in the same. I haven't moved out yet, so I went to his house on my lunch break (because I knew he wouldn't be there). He slept in the guest bedroom last night and there's a picture of my friends and I on the nightstand in that room. He had turned it face down. For whatever reason this broke my heart, but I also secretly hope it means he couldn't sleep either and he misses me too. Everyone says the same to me, that he will regret it, I hope that's true. I spent our whole relationship wanting to feel wanted, I guess that feeling doesn't go away just because a relationship is over.

It is heartbreaking not to feel wanted by the one you want to want you. My ex befouling this current one came by today to get some papers he needed for our son. He is my other son's father. He knows somewhat of my current situation. He gave me a hug before he left then kissed me and went to feel me up. I stopped him before it led to anything further. He has a girlfriend and they have a 2 month old baby. I told him I am not going to let any man do that to any women. I am in no position either to be accepting affection from another man right now either. It actually hurt so bad. I wante so much for my current about to be ex to want me like that. To have that desire for me. But he doesn't anymore and it is hard to accept. And now things are just going to be weird with my other son's father. What is wrong with people? Does no one value monogamy anymore? Or their family for that matter? I know I am all over the place here but wtf happened today?

You were vulnerable and he took
advantage of it. You need strong
Boundaries to keep the bad ones
Away from you. Think of yourself
like a fort with A mote. Self protect
to protect your Inner self and core
From all emotional manipulators.
HUGS