I am trying not to judge you, but I have been through 23 years of mental and emotional abuse. It's been devastating to me and my daughter on so many levels. I am happy that you can acknowledge your abuse, which is more than my stbx can do.

I an very sorrt to you and your daughter for having to go thru it. i know no person should have to. I just realized it all to late

It may be too late for your marriage, but it's not too late for you unless you want to give up. Are you in counseling? Change is hard work, but you've already taken the first step in admitting you are an abuser. A lot of people never even come to that realization. Keep going and work on yourself so that your future relationships can be positive and fulfilling for both of you.

I wish this is how every mans brain would work. Especially my husbands. Who forgets how special I am.

My ex forgot my specialness too once he
Decided i was the bad guy and he was un
Happy then all was my fault.

When someone Is selfish they can not look
honestly because They are selfish and stuck
And resentments keep growing.

They need professional or at minimum group
Help with awareness for true changing and
growing. Many marriages end because of
Selfishness and brokenness. HUGS

I can totally relate as my relationship ended because of my lies and deceipt. I never cheated on her, I am a compulsive liar. The hardest part is knowing that she still loves me, will always love me, but can't be with me until I heal.

The hardest part about healing is you have to do it for yourself. I have always been a "pleaser" and done things for other people. This will not work when you are trying to heal from an addiction.

If you still love each other, stay in contact, show her that you are working at getting better, all the while giving her whatever space she needs. All of this is easier said than done but if you think about what you will be getting in return for the investment of time and work, it will be well worth it and your relationship will be even stronger in the end.

Good luck to you...

Its about healing for yourself, for you alone
Or you will never get better, its not about getting
Someone back into your life. Thats only a short
term fix And not an honest one.

Often when there is abuse or addiction issues they
Are deep and you need to work hard on changing
Those behaviors and really truly embrace the changes
and Keep working them so you are the best version of
A healthy new you for you to love no matter where the
Relationship is or isn't. HUGS

I appreciate all the comments and support. thank you all. I am working hard on me. tonight we talked and had a nice conversation. I think time away will be the best for both of us.