Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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speechless1000 02/03/2017

I've not posted in a while I was hoping that in time I could post something more positive but this is not the case. I've started counselling and I've accepted help from the dr by taking medication to help with my anxiety but the feelings of worthlessness are not diminishing. My stbex has kept his distance we've not argued so nothing has changed yet I feel so utterly worthless. I feel like no one will ever see past my damage and pain. I'm so lonely. It's my sons birthday party this w/e and it will be the first without my husband and I am dreading it. Isn't that awful? I thought by now I would at least feel better. I'm getting the kids to school, the house is clean, the kids are fed & loved & im still working full time but I'm utterly worthless. I don't even know why I'm posting as this is not cathartic or helpful. I just feel worth nothing.

cleigh 02/03/2017

You are letting negativity win. You are giving him the power over your emotions. You need to stop. Easier said than done. However, in this post you listed positives.
1. You are working ful time, providing for your family...HUGE positive
2. Your kids are loved. You know you're a good mom making your kids a priority.

Focus on you! What makes you happy. ( and no, you can't say him)?
Going through a divorce is excruciatingly painful! But you can only control your actions, no one else. I've said it many times....don't live in the past, it will rob you of your future!

KelleyPaterson 02/03/2017

I have been seperated for a year. I am living on my own. It's a very hard adjustment to make being on your own again. Be gentle with yourself. It's going to take time. It sounds like you are headed in the right direction.

bluelab97 02/03/2017

@KelleyPaterson--I am about 6 months behind you. It is hard trying to figure out who you are once your spouse has left. I like how you and cleigh pointed out to focus on ourselves and I am slowly learning how to do that. Of course, some days are better than others but I am looking forward to seeing what the future holds. @Speechless1000--hang in there, take a day at a time. I would strongly recommend you to see a counselor, if your employer offers this service, you should take it because it is and will be a roller coaster ride in which I know you are already experiencing. However, counseling has helped me in ways to deal with all those emotions. Sending lots of hugs to you!

speechless1000 02/03/2017

Thank you all for taking your time to reply. Much appreciated. I'm just so sick of feeling like this my counsellor says I'm completely justified in feeling worthless (this will be my 2nd divorce). My first husband let me down badly and my second is now repeating that. I can't believe I've been had twice. I'm a really good person, I'd help anyone. I loved both my husbands and were nothing but 100% loyal so why is this happening to me?? I feel like this is about me. That's why I feel so bloody hopeless & worthless, things have to get better - right? X

crazydaisy 02/03/2017

Be kind to yourself. You know that this feeling and pain is all temporary, just ride the wave. Eventually it will stop and you will be adjusted to the new normal. Just take it second by second. You are enough, you are strong, remind yourself of all the way God has blessed you. Your children, job, home. Try and overpower those negative feelings with positivity. Us as human beings are very very resilient. Look at all of the things we have adapted to. You WILL adapt to your situation, you won't feel like this forever. In the end you will feel the strongest you have ever felt. Just give yourself time and breathe. You are going to be ok. Try and find the silver lining,. Enjoy your kids, be a strong mom for them. I am praying for you! And I hope your day gets better.

Bashful 02/03/2017

I try to count my blessings each day. I am blessed to have my children with me, my own apartment, a fabulous job, the best bosses, and a supportive family. I do this as a coping strategy when the anxiety starts to creep in my life. One day your kids will look at you and see the incredibly strong woman you are. It's not easy but your not alone.

speechless1000 02/03/2017

I do try & count my blessings every morning and night. Thank you all so much for responding I'm really grateful x

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