Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I have been on here many times, and although I know the steps I am taking will help me in the long run, right now I feel horrible. I am having one of those weeks where I can't get it together. I have been trying to get motivated just to go to work, but I can't seem to get anything done. I know grieving is a process, but I can't keep falling apart at work. I feel so alone, and just can't seem to figure thngs out. I can't get no relief from the pain I am in. I am trying everything I can think of. Months later I am still in my office crying as I write this. I just can't take anymore..... I have many blessings in life, that I am grateful for, but I am stuck in such a bad place.
It sounds like depression which is completely normal and understandable in this situation. Perhaps some antidepressants and/or anti-anxiety meds would help you get through some of this? I'm a big believer in them and got on them when my ex left.
When my son was a freshman in high school, I was told I probably had ovarian cancer and the survival rate for that sucks. I'm the only parent he's ever had and I was a basket case. Fortunately it was just a cyst (the size of a grapefruit which is why they were so alarmed.) The only way I could function until I saw the oncologist who said it was probably nothing and was right (he was my FAVORITE doctor! lol) was with anti-anxiety medication. Otherwise I would just cry and cry.
Getting your emotions leveled out a bit might help you function and maybe make all of this a bit less overwhelming. When your emotions are running so high, everything is harder.
Hope your day gets better. Hugs!
I highly recommend it. It can be a lot to take in, but the premise is basically separating yourself from your feelings and not letting them take over your life. Also letting yourself feel the pain as a means to release it.
It also talks about how we keep ourselves busy sometimes as a means to avoid feeling the pain which is why it still haunts us. All the things you are doing to help yourself are good things, but I found myself doing all of those things and still in pain. Like I would go to yoga and then just cry in the middle of class and I couldn't understand why it wasn't easing my pain.
Because I was essentially holding the pain in and trying to quiet it and avoid it, instead of feeling it and releasing it.
I know this sounds like phony self-help speak that doesn't mean anything, but I read and reread certain paragraphs of it until it resonated with me personally. I really didn't know what that meant to "release the pain". Some days it meant staying home and crying for a few hours. Some days it was writing letters to myself in my journal as a means to objectify the pain instead of seeing it as something that defined me.
Not sure what it will mean to you, but it might be a good book to read in the state you're in.
Disclaimer: this is not a one-stop solution to all of my problems. I'm also working in therapy, taking meds and doing acupuncture. But I found the book extremely helpful in changing the way I look at life.
I'm sorry you're sad and hang in there. Keep going.