I think everyone on here is here because they are having a hard time getting through this... but I am sure that there are a few out there who have made it through and come back to help us who still struggle. It does get better, but it takes time..and I think that it will be time that will heal us.

Thank you, spirit11

I have. I only remain on this particular board to support others who are just starting on this mess of a roller coaster. You will get through it, it just takes alot of time and looking at yourself. Just so you can have a little history about me, my stbx was cheating on me with my best friend. He left the first time right before I found out I was pregnant with our third child. I didn't tell him about the baby right away bc I didn't want him to only come back bc of the baby. I literally had no one to talk to about any of it. He left the second time when I was 7 months pregnant. That's when I found DS, I was looking for support groups for pregnancy and stumbled upon B&D. He came back long enough to be here for the birth of our child and put me through hell by continuing his affair yet trying to make me believe he wanted to work on our marriage. Our youngest is 2&1/2 now. I worked through my marraige failing and am in the ever so scary dating world. I am happy with me. You will get there, too. Hugs!

I wouldn't say I'm through this, it has been 4 months since he left we were together 28yrs. I definitely am on my way but I still have occassional bouts of sadness and anger over how he treated me. Everything people say about being strong etc. is true. At the beginning I questioned about being strong but I guess I am. We have no choice but to move forward so do the best you can and we are here for support.HUGS

I think I can say with some conviction that the worst is over for me and all that's left is the grabbing life by the balls again. I figure that might happen with the spring thaw -- seems fitting.

And who knows if I'll ever feel like dating again? I think that will come along in due time too, although it isn't here yet.

But I can still remember the many days and nights I found dark and hard to tolerate, wondering how I'd survive it.

Hang in there.

I also made the decision to end the marriage about 6 months ago. I went through hell. Grieved and expressed more sorrow than I knew I could possibly withstand--even though the end of the marriage was MY choice.

Then after about 6 weeks of intense grieving and free fall, the intensity eased and I started to rebuild a much better life for myself.

I am only starting the legal process now. I am not through with anything yet, but I am definitely moving on to a better place. Taking care of myself. Building a good relationship with my children.

But for awhile I thought I might die! In a way, I guess a part of me did die--the part that needed to so that another part could start to be born!