that most certainly is a question you have to ask yourself. not solely based on romanticized memories but who they are and whether you wish a life with or without them at all. The mindset of believing you can remain best friends is also often over believed.

I also suggest obtaining an understanding of the distancer-pursuer relationship and the effect it has on a relationship. If for no other reason than to learn from and move forward. I will mention too that desperation rarely re-attracts a wayward spouse. Ive pointed to some of this info in my journals, if you wish to read more

Thank you for pointing me to your journals they were very informative. I have been trying for a while to force myself to try to start the process of moving on and to show her that I am trying to move on. Its so hard to do because I cant think of how to move on and deep down I don't want to. I know I need to stop pursuing her, but that thought hurts a lot.

It's both. However, you have to let go to let her see what she is missing. I am trying to teach myself that now although I just regrettably signed divorce papers yesterday. I am not afraid of being alone but I do love my husband. What I will not allow is the blatant disrespect, dragging of my name and our history to support his lies and infidelity. I finally decided to let him have what he says he want although I feel he doesn't want it but is loss and want to prove something to someone who means nothing. After 2 months this is infatuation. He built it on a lie and they will never be happy. I do not feel that God will bless this union that he/she is trying to create off of a lie. Please understand that your self worth and self love is more important. Do not allow her to have one foot in and one foot out the door. Do not wait for her to choose. You choose you! I had to and I am sure I will be fine eventually but I refuse to be a doormat. This is not easy trust me I cry more than anything but I know that I don't deserve this and things will get better. If you know (not feel) that you are the reason for her leaving. Show her the new and improved side of you. If not allow time and continue to work on you. If its meant to be it will be. At least that is what people are telling me. Good Luck, I will be praying for you.

Limbo is a very bad place and many of us have
Been there, its soul sucking at best. I would get
Into therapy to talk to someone and get some
Guidance. You are only harming yourself the
Longer you keep trying to fix or force solutions.

The grief and rejection is very real and heart
breaking. It takes a lot of work to move thru it
To get to the other side. Most people that are
not checked out will feel their grief.

Supposedly the checked out spouse has already
Grieved their losses while coming to their decision
To leave you and the marriage and many will find
someone else before leaving they are not going it
Alone.

My ex had his GF all lined up and ready to go. He
was already Bonded with her too If they are bonded
to another Forget about any hope of reconciliation it
will not work.

They Broke their bond with you and their vows already
If they cheated and betrayed you. They Did not love And
respect you or they would not have cheated.

The infidelity forum talks more on reconciliation with a
Cheating spouse. Some people even want to stay with
Serial cheaters. HUGS