Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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I’m not good

Misty82
Misty82

I'm having a difficult time with my breakup.  Very difficult.  He's moving out this Wednesday and this is the end of 7 years.  He cheated on me with a coworker who so know.  He denied it but so found evidence and know it's true.  Right now so literally feel like I'm dying inside.  It's like he's replacing me and tossing me out like I don't matter.  He spent the night at her place last night I think.  He still lives here till Wednesday and hen he's gone.


The thing that gets to me is that I really loved him and treated him well. Always there no matter what, faithful and loving.  I really cared about him and he left me for someone who did nothing.  She didn't have to deal with the years of his alcoholism, disrespect, manipulation, lack of support and all of his bad decisions. She just walked right in and took him from me and he let her.  
She knows me and doesn't care about me or how this makes me feel.  She has been pursuing him for months now.


My heart hurts so bad and I'm so embarrassed and ashamed that I allowed myself to be a pushover in this relationship.  Now I have all this healing to do and everything is so overwhelming.  I'm a single mom to 4 teenagers that still need me constantly and so don't know how to heal when so have no time.  I took off work today and it's the first day in over a year I have been at home alone for more than 30 minutes.  Not kidding.


Om experiencing extreme anxiety and so don't know what to do.  I'm not good.  I don't know how o can get through this and be ok.

brandnewangel
brandnewangel
She did you a favor you might not see it now!! You might think he will be kind and sweet to her give it time… he will be the same to her some people are born to be jerks..

I’ve been there and tried to be everything to them to basically get the door slammed in my face… but I realized my self worth is more important than being with someone who doesn’t care…

You tried to make this relationship work when he honestly didn’t give a shit and relationship is teamwork not solo … let him be with her because she will realize he’s a jerk..
Able76
Able76
It hurts now. Hell, may hurts even more for a while. But at some point you’ll feel relieved. I know first hand. I’m on your very same spot(only difference is our gender). Stay strong. Better things are going to happen to you soon than you expect.
Misty82
Misty82
It definitely hurts like hell. I have extreme anxiety today. I’m hurting so bad. i literally can’t function.
urbangardener
urbangardener
Oh, Misty, just another brick in the wall of misery with this bad man. Please change your self talk to how you deserve to be your own best friend and no longer attach to bad men with no remorse or empathy. You so deserve to seek healing.

I also think this dude is just finding another dumb woman to use. He used you and doesn’t love you. I wish you could see things from a different perspective. You’ll keep attaching to bad men until you fix you so you no longer want this crap in your life. Beloved, you are enough, you have value and worth just as you are.
Misty82
Misty82
Urbangardener your’e right. He has used me and I do feel pretty dumb and down on myself. I believed him when he told me loved me. He used to cry and tell me how much I meant to him. But his actions speak otherwise. I feel my whole life has been torn apart and now I got to pick up the prices and I don’t feel like I have the strength. I’m physically and mentally tired. I’m in bed today and missed work and o can barely get up. All of this because of him and me making bad decisions to let it go on this long. I’m super depressed and feel so low about myself. I’m not happy with myself.
I’m also afraid to be single a I crave attention and partnership. This will be the first time besides the mini breakups I’ve had that I’m actually single in 20 years.
I don’t know how to be alone. I have my kids it it’s not the same,
urbangardener
urbangardener
Gentle hugs to you and some soft tissues. Feel how you feel and recognize the incredible insight you just shared. Tell yourself you are worthy of love and it starts with loving myself first. Keep saying it and reading it with a note somewhere you’ll see it twice daily. You may not believe it now but in a month, if you say a positive affirmation every day, it gets real to us.

Of course you feel depressed. Your situation worries us for you! We care about you! Take today as a day to feel and to heal and know you’ll be one step closer to moving forward. Tomorrow it’s get up and seize the respect and love within yourself for yourself. A man won’t heal you or complete you. Seek counseling or even help in a behavioral health hospital if you can’t make it out of bed. Hugs and much love to you.