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I wish I did not have to ask anything of him

rose77
rose77
Since I have to sell my house by the time my son is 21, my mortgage co suggested that it would be ok to use the option of refinancing by extending my mtg to a 30 year mtg. This would lower my interest rate to 5.5, and there would be no closing fees. I now have 15 years left, this would save me 457 dollars a month. The problem is that my ex would have to sign and I dont know if he would because he wants me to refinance with his credit union, combining his IRS debt and his credit card debt. I of cause will not do this, but have not given him an answerer of no because I know when I do he will not sign those papers. I know I have to approach him with this because I really, really need to lower my mtg, but I cant piss him off either. I hate this I just wish that I did not have to approach him with anything any longer, it is to complicated with the whole emotions of it, and the not knowing which personality I will get.
MsBlank1
MsBlank1
Can you get advice from your lawyer? I'm in a similar situation and know my case may end up back in court becuz my ex is highly uncooperative.
Hope you find some resolve and wish you luck with that.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))
Misred
Misred
Ugh, I had to ask my EX too sign something awhile back and really didn't want to ask so I know how you feel Fortunate for me I caught him in a good mood. He practically bent over backwards wanting to do it for me. He was missing me and wanted to see me in person. This gave him a reason. Double Ugh. Anyway, I have no advice, just hugs and wish you the best (((HUGS)))
deleted_user
deleted_user
If you open this door up and let your husbands IRS debt get tangled with the house and the mortage you are risking losing the house. If your ex defaults on the payments to the IRS. They have very stiff peniltiys for late payments. They can come in seize your house and seize all your bank accounts and all of your assets. I agree with Ms Blank consult with an attorney and find out what your options are.
COVER YOUR ASS! DONT RISK LOSING EVERTHING!
deleted_user
deleted_user
talk with your lawyer if possible.

if not, don't do it. walk away from the house and get an apt that you can afford.

when the time comes, buy another house. but, don't get a 30 year mortgage. always get a 15 year loan. that is one of the best kept secrets in the industry.
deleted_user
deleted_user
How old is your son? That seems like an important part of the equation.

If you really want to stay in the house and lowering the payments will let you do that, then you'll just have to ask. The worst response he can have is no.

He sounds like a difficult man. I hope you get the good personality when you approach him.
lycesq
lycesq
Rose - if he refuses to sign, he can be compelled to do it by the court. I agree with the other posts- time to lawyer up!

Lynne
rose77
rose77
Thanks for all your advice, and helpful support. My son is 18 so I do have to sell by the time he is 21. I really am hesitant in extending the loan to a 30 mtg even though I know I have to sell it before the time is up. The savings will be a big help, but I was looking more to lowing my interest rate then extending my years. I really dont want to do that.
No matter what, I know it would be the stupidest thing I can do if I refinance adding on his debt just so he will be able to combine his debts, and make it easier on him to pay off his problems. I am just going to have to let him know that I cannot be responsible for him, and let the consequences fall where they may. He will not like it, but I will have to take that chance. I do hope he understands, and I catch him in a good mood so that if I do need anything signed he will be on my side and help me out. I have to catch him when he is trying to prove he is a good guy.