Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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I thought we were meant to be

strumphyy
strumphyy
I cannot imagine finding someone new, loving an other or being loved again..I had my hopes up with my ex, thought we were going to get married and in my mind he was the one for me..
How am I to move on to someone else?..Even though he doesn't love me anymore, it would still feel like betrayal..How am I to let someone else into my life when i feel so hurt, when all the damage has closed that entrance for someone else to get in?..
What if he was the one for me and I lost him?
deleted_user
deleted_user
He wasn't the one for you. The one for you will love you unconditionally. Hugs for your pain.
deleted_user
deleted_user
You can't worry about the "what ifs". You need to focus on the what is and reach for what will be. Really I am not trying to be philisophical just stating it as simple as I can. Save the what ifs for questions like what if pigs fly... I hope you understand what I am saying.

All you have is now and all you can change is you and the future. If he was the "one" then he would be with you now so that is no longer the question. The question should be: What will make me happier that I can control? What can I do to achieve this happiness? Do I like me? Do I love me?

You have to love yourself first and foremost before you can even think of loving anyone else again.

Hugs and hearts
deleted_user
deleted_user
One of the things that I told myself was in order to have the love of my life, I had to get rid of the one causing pain and chaos in my life. We have 5 children and they love their daddy, but if abuse is the only kind of love he can offer who needs it?
meddle
meddle
Sorry about your situation. Personally I wouldn't even be considering "someone else" during this period of grief. A wounded spirit takes time to heal, find your nourishing power... then maybe consider moving on. Good vibes your way...
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree with the last post. I am not near letting someone else in...but I know one day I will be able to. I think we have to take the time we need to heal ourselves and when we are whole again our hearts will be strong enough for a new love. Hang in there...it will get easier.
deleted_user
deleted_user
You just have to find the strength within you, to be happy... When you are truly happy you might even see that you two were not meant for one another... but if he really is the one for you, you guys will find your back to one another, someday...
strumphyy
strumphyy
Thank you for your replies:) Even If I wanted to I couldn't elt someone in now..I am not whole again..A part of me has gone with him and I have to rebuild it..
dirtdiva
dirtdiva
I understand how you feel, but I want you to know that you will be whole again. I am going to tell you the advice that my mother told me that got me thinking.... Love goes away....

I know I will be ok some day. At thats what I am looking forward too.I just wish it would be now versus later.

I hope you do the same. Youre beautiful and young. You still have so much ahead of you.

Ill be rooting for you
hurtinandhealin2560
hurtinandhealin2560
I'm sorry you're hurting. You must take time to heal and learn to love yourself before you worry about loving another. Take time and do what it takes to grieve the relationship and heal.

((((strumphyy))))
deleted_user
deleted_user
from what you say, i wouldn't worry about it, your not ready. you have not healed. and he was not the one for you even though you thought he was. focus on yourself and not on any other relationship with a man. take care of you.