I knew his vacation week was coming and I tried so very hard to prepare myself to hear that he was going away (knowing that it was to meet one or, many of the women he has) but when my son told me I did feel like crap. I don't know if its the fact that he is with all these women or that he tells me he has no money but can fly to all these different places to meet his women that bother me more. Probably both I know we are divorced so he can see and do what he wants now, but I still get that ping of hurt when I know he is off with these women he has met online. I am going to try more then I have in the past to not think of him or care what he is doing. I am going to try to not let it matter to me. I do talk to his Mom once in awhile I call her to see how she is doing, but I think I need to even stop that even if its for awhile. Its enough that I have to connect with him at times because of the kids. I really need to have no contact for any reason and do what I need to in order to move on and not care what he thinks of me. I am going to do what I have to even if it pisses him off Hell I am so pissed at him for what he has done to me in every way I need to not care what he thinks. It does not matter if he does not like me I will think of myself and hope that this is what it takes to move on.