Now nearing the end of my separation period I have definitely experienced this. Initially I had trouble sleeping and would wake up confused that my ex was not in bed with me, then I would remember that she had cheated on me and we were split up. I would be instantly awake and sick to my stomach.

Time has helped, so has the support of family and friends. But they were by no means a solution.

I too suffered from this and still do. I wake up in the middle of the night all the time and am like WTF! I have learned from others that it does get better with time, but you have to keep working on yourself. Meditate if you haven't tried that (great way to calm the mind) and write down daily gratitudes. Oddly enough, I have started to find that dating can actually help because you will come across some people who call you on your BS and challenge to you be in the present. It's easier to stay stuck than it is to move forward. Focus on today and tomorrow. The past is done. You are awesome and lovable.

This is not a fun phase at all. I would encourage you to continue to keep your life busy and full of things you enjoy and people who support and love you. Between that and time, it should get better. Find one good thing each day that makes your heart happy and is a way that you are expressing self-care and self-love. Find yourself again and rediscover the things that bring joy to your life.

Let me explain this from my perspective. If you are walking down the sidewalk and you fall in a hole, it might be difficult, annoying and time consuming to dig yourself out. It's not your fault because you truly didn't know the hole was there.

If you walk down the same sidewalk the next day and fall in the same hole, that was foolish, cause you knew it was there and you just weren't paying attention. It should take you less time to get out the second time, because you already dug yourself out once. You really should have been paying attention the second day, so it's your fault you fell into the hole.

If you fall in the same hole on day three, it's totally you fault. You knew it was there and you already fell in it twice. All I can say is you must like holes.

Every single day that you wake up and chose to ruminate over your ex, you are choosing to fall into that hole all on your own. You know you need to get yourself in gear, stay busy, get out and meet new people, an force yourself to move on, but for some reason you prefer to wallow in that hole. At this point your ex is not doing it to you, you are doing it to yourself. You're caught in a self perpetuating feedback loop where you dream about him, wake up and ruin you day thinking about him and that makes you more likely to dream of him again. The cycle will go on and on until you decide to break it.

You are the only one with control over your personal happiness. There is a big bad world, filled with interesting people, new food you never tasted, new movies you have never watched, new books you've never read, and a million sights you've never seen. Sitting at home and thinking about the dude who walked out on you is a total waste of time and maladaptive. Get out and live a little...or a lot!

I have always been haunted by bad dreams and they usually had something to do with my husband doing something terrible. Foreshadowing? Now I have the same dreams but I know they are true. It hurts and makes it hard to rest. I do a lot of praying and reading before bed and that helps a bit. Hopefully time will help too.