Hello, This is new to me, but feel that someone may be able to shed some light or hopefully offer some good advice...

My wife of 8 years recently filed for divorce three weeks ago.

We have had ups and downs in our marriage, but near the end of OCT this year she fell into a deep depression after a boyfriend of a previous abusive relationship of hers passed away unexpectily. Her depression seemed to revolve around how life is short etc and how she never forgave him. I was confused, but supportive. She asked that we separate so she could "find herself". I was reluctant, angry and upset, but knew that this was most likely what we needed to move though this. Friends and family suggested I hold firm to the house and make her leave (as they know she has a history of depression, anxiety and needs help to work thought her past, but always refuses). So I did, but was as supportive as I could be, always offering help etc.

As we neared the end of NOV she broke down, told me she did not want to move out, loved me for who I was and for loving her unconditionally, and nothing in our relationship was worth separating or divorce, she agreed to seek help and wanted me to help her find this. Everything appeared to be on track and the look in her eyes reminded me of of the day we married, but within two days of this, she signed a six month lease and began moving, again stating her need to find herself, and blaming me for many of our marital issues.

At that point I drew a line, my supportive nature took a turn for the worst, and she became angry and full or harsh words.

Two days after she moved out, she sent me an email stating how disgusting the apartment she rented was, and that she (and our two children) were staying with friends until a new one was available. It was at this point I demanded that our daughter stay with me at the house, and this only fueled her anger. She filed for divorce that day.

After receiving the papers, I decided to do the only thing I thought was best and disconnect from our relationship and only focus on me and the kids. I knew there was nothing I could say or do at this point.

For the past few weeks she has initiated every contact we make, I don't say i love you, or talk about "us" at all, its only about the kids when anything has been discussed. She has always seemed happy in text messages, emails or short phone calls and has happily moved forward with parental courses needed by the court to finalize the divorce. However, when she found out I was out with friends recently, she immediately called me for no reason. Later she sends me messages stating how wonderful a person I am, that I am the best man she has ever known and how lucky someone will be to with me, also asking what she may have done wrong in our relationship, only to call me the next day to offer her help in scheduling my own parental classes for the divorce.

I have also noticed that when we do talk on the phone, I generally keep the conversations "business like" and to the point, and I can tell she is irritated by this, and once we have discussed everything that needed discussed I end the conversation, and can tell she is irritated by that, almost as if she has something else to say, but never does.

Im not sure if I see small signs of her wanting to work something out, or just my wishful thinking...? She appears happy, and has never indicated to me she has any intention to want to work on anything. I am trying to move forward the best way I can, but so much want an opportunity to mend our marriage. Its been an awful roller coster over the past three months.

Am I doing the right thing by handling the situation the way I have? What can I be doing differently? Is there something that I am missing?