So I asked my ex fianc to see him or go to dinner or spend a day together doing something fun. He used to live 3 hours away and moved closer where he is now an hour and a half away. During the break up, there was a lot of hate and anger and a lot of shit that neither of us could handle. We broke up over the phone and we haven't seen each other since before the break up. I feel like I've gotten over a lot of my anger and everything has calmed down. From the way he texted me, it seems like he's calmed down too because he's actually considering hanging out. He was completely against it before and his reason was he didn't want to hurt me. I asked him why he would see me if he chose to and his response was "i'll tell you if i see you." He is currently thinking about it but he's leaning towards yes, according to him.

I know this could back fire in my face because I should be moving on, not talking to him, etc. But I really want to see him and seems like he may want to see me too? I am really scared though of either outcome. What if he sees me and wants to fix things? Is that what he's implying on telling me when he sees me? What if all the feelings come rushing back?

I have been able to control my emotions lately. I was crying every night and now I cry less, I was missing him a lot yesterday so i listened to his old voicemails and cried. Maybe I am crazy for coming up with this hang out but I feel like we deserve it. We loved each other very much and broke up on the phone, shouldn't we see each other? Maybe I am stupid and this will bite my in the ass but is that bad that I want to find out?