Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

13,009 Members
100,360 Posts
0 Online
Relationships & Sexuality
/ Breakups & Divorce Support Group

I let her win :(

Lloydie79
Lloydie79

My wife of 4 years and partner of 12 was my life. I am lost without her. I miss her smell, her cheeky laugh when she thought she won the play fights. I miss the tight cuddles. The passionate kisses. The i loves you's. She was my rock my everything and she broke me. 

Broken34
Broken34
I can totally relate. Do you have friends and family that support you and are there for you in this difficult time? I don't and its beyond difficult, if you do hold them near, this too shall pass. Hugs
Javen
Javen
I just joined this group and this is all new to me. I’m now “co-habitating” with the man that I spent over 10 years with. I found out that he cheated and then things got even worse. In all this I am trying to save my relationship only for him to look at me and throw me away. People say it gets easier and nothing lasts, etc etc etc. I try each day to process being furious, bursting into tears at the bank because of the teller having her wedding photo in view, and then trying to put on a happy face at work. Then going home to the house we still share but separate bedrooms and trying to appear fine and then trying to not react to him when he tries to bait me either into a fight or tears.
Lloydie79
Lloydie79
I do have support but none of my friends really understands. Its been nearly a year since she left and its not getting any easier.
jojored
jojored
OK, so if you see it as her "winning" and you by default "losing", why are you still hanging on? Sorry if this is sounding harsh, but she made a choice to end things, and it seems as if she has moved on. You're only hurting yourself now by not fighting hard enough to move on.


One of the things I learned after my 30+ years with my ex is that no one other than me can be my rock. I can't lean on someone to the point that if they're gone, I'm gone too. I am a person in my own right, whether as part of a couple or not, and I am responsible for the direction my own life takes. I can chose to sulk and lament the betrayals of the past and stay in that phase, or face them head on, acknowledge the pain, learn a thing or two, and move on in a new direction.


If you haven't been to counseling, I would suggest that route. Also, get your mind off your relationship by meeting new people, people who never knew her, so that you'll be less tempted to live in the past and rehash those old memories. Now is the time for new memories, new experiences, new self-discoveries. Take care of yourself, and look forward to your new path in life.