Below is a link I posted a couple of weeks back, I should have posted in this section but was not able to find the divorce section.

Please take a read:

http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Depression/forum/21355639-im-so-sad-i-just

Now to follow up from the link:

Today is 6 weeks that my HS sweetheart walked out on me and just about 4 weeks since shes asked for a divorce. Over these past weeks Ive gone through and continue to go through so many emotions and I am becoming overwhelmed. Most days I cry just out of the blue and recently Ive stated to dry heaving several times a day. Ive had some up moments, but they have been few and far between as most of my time is spent playing the years over in my head and how its come to this. I look back on our years together and while we had some down years (due to no fault of our own), most were filled with happiness and joy. In fact up until 18 months ago I thought we were doing great, sadly I was wrong. However I will mention this is not the 1st time she left me. We got engaged August 1995, by November 1995 she broke it off as she was cheating on me with someone 5 years younger than her (23-18). That was devastating to me, it took me months to get over it. I finally moved on and in late 1997 she had tracked me down and said she made the biggest mistake in her life. Long story short we married November 1999 and I actually felt the time apart gave us time to grow and made us stronger as a couple.

So here I am again, alone, depressed and feeling like a failure, this is the emotion that has really taken over my life. My parents were divorced and I swore Id never go down that path, yet here I am at 44 getting divorced from my wife, my lover, my confidant, my best friend. I cannot stop feeling like its all my fault, that I could have done things differently and instead of being divorced Id still be happily married. I guess Im felling like this because she blaming a lot of this on the 4-5 years we were going through some tragedies in our lives (shes not directly blaming me, just the time period), this is all outlined in my thread above. The fact she could tell me that she got tired of caring for my needs and now needs to care for herself is really weighing on me. I thought thats what marriage was about, was I wrong? I was there for her all these years and Im not felling like she is.

Anyway Monday we are going to file the divorce paperwork with the County Court, we should get a court date within 30 days, at that point it will all be over. Since we are amicable, no kids and agree on the division of the assets we can do a simple dissolution and avoid a long drawn out process and costly attorneys. However I continue to fight for her, I remind her daily that I love her and am willing to try anything to salvage our marriage, sadly she wants no part of it. I know I need to stop doing this but I am not going to go down without a fight as I still believe the person I love is locked away somewhere and I need to bust her out.

Well need to get back to work, thanks all for listening and I look forward to reading the replies!

Signed,
Every negative emotion you can think of, lol!