Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I'm in college. I've been dating this guy, now my ex, for over a year. We were perfectly fine, happy, making serious future plans. And then one day.. he just stopped answering. Wouldn't talk to me wouldn't pick up the phone. I kept begging him to speak to me, and he kept saying no that it was just done. But he wouldn't tell me why. Finally he told me he was marrying someone.. that he didn't want to leave me but he had to for personal reasons and that we couldn't be together because he'd be getting married soon. He said he still loved me, acted like it hurt him and then said we couldn't talk anymore. He said we couldn't even be friends or be in each other's lives. That was hard for me.. cause I was used to him all day long every single day. So for about a month now, I've been begging to just try with me. To find a way to be together. And he just says we cant.. that he can't be with anyone. And I felt bad for him and sad because we both wanted to be together but we couldn't. But today.. as I went to school I got assigned a lab partner.. a girl I've never met until this day. Like I said I'm in college but he's not he doesn't go to school anymore. And I've never even known of this girl she's completely random. And as soon as we start the lab she says "we're you dating '___'" and I said yes. I told her the whole situation. And then she said.. "I have some recent messages with him" and she showed me them. He's flirting with her and calling her sexy and beautiful. Then she said she actually met him on a dating site..
so here I've been.. for a month feeling sorry for what he's been "going through" crying every night because he said we couldn't be together, trying every waking moment to get him not to "marry" someone else and just wait. I've been so upset and then I find out that he's been messing around with these girls this whole time. So now I don't even know if the marriage thing is true. And if it is then he could've kept me in his life, he just didn't want to. Because if he can talk to random girls.. he can talk to me. The person he "loves". And he was just telling me this morning that he couldn't see me in person because it would hurt him too much and he wouldn't be able to handle it. And then 2 hours later my LAB PARTNER tells me all of this..
i feel like I don't know what was real anymore. If the whole relationship was a lie the whole time and I invested a year in someone who didn't care. I don't know why he even told me he was hurting and that he loved me but that things had to end. Cause if he loved me he would've stayed and he wouldn't be talking to these girls.. it's so easy for him. If i never reach out to him first he probably never will. But yet i can't sleep or concentrate and i spend so much time crying and in bed. And i just don't know what to do anymore. Before today I had sole hope that we could find a way to be together. But now I know there's not because he's been lying. And I don't know how to get over it
Enough is enough! Time to let him know whose the boss and the catch! Tell his ass you wish him the best in his "marriage"; and tell him that your new lab partner showed you these texts, and informed you that she met him on a dating site. And tell him he's right it is best not to be in eachothers life, you guys are not right for eachother anyways. You need someone on your level; your young, hot, and getting an educate and feel like you just need to focus on school, and will test the waters again when your ready. CASE CLOSED! His mouth will drop down to the floor like someone smashed the wind out of him. Then, shake it off like Mariah Carey. From a women whose been there, you will get over him, meet somebody better, and live a fabulous life. All of this stuff happened to 2 of my other college girlfriends too, now their both happily married one to a laywer and the other a doctor. Me soon to be , to a multi-millionaire! Girl tell him bye bye. You got the upper hand here sweety.
When people hear " sociopath" they think a murderer, a criminal, but it doesn't have to to be that.
These people break the rules of normal human interaction because they are incapable of FEELING love, compassion, fidelity, sadness.
It s like they are broken. They imitate human emotions and they are extremely intelligent and good at it.
He used you. He either used you for sex or for all the admiration you gave him, I m not sure .
I was involved with someone like that for years like a fool and nothing good came of it.
I am so sorry you are hurting, I understand how it feels.... but don't try to get him back. He may or may not come back but he will never marry you and he will always have sex with other women.
Hugs